More on Pets

It's just too hot outside....I really have no energy today, but thought I'd share a funny that happened the other morning. Well as most ASD parents can testify to.....while on this journey, you just HAVE to have a sense of humor....sometimes it develops into a very warped sense of humor. Also, you tend to find humor in some of the most bizzare things.

Example.....our cat "Mr. Fatty" a.k.a. "Scooter" has such a weird personality, and he's a Diva in some ways due to being so spoiled. And although he has a water dish and receives fresh drinking water every day, he still likes to jump up on the sink and drink from the faucet at least 1-2 times per day. Amazingly, for his size he's quite limber. He will sit there, perched on the counter and "meow" until you turn the faucet on for him....and the water has to be turned on to just the right level....not too much of a water stream and not too little. I swear sometimes when he's meowing at me, it's almost like he's really trying to talk.

Also, he expects his litter box to be cleaned a certain way -- and if he thinks it's not scooped enough, he will find ways to let us know his displeasure (poop on the floor right next to the litter box, etc). Well usually on trash day, the litterboxes are completely changed -- old litter dumped out, litterboxes cleaned and new litter put into them. Of course "Scooter" and "Miss Diva" have their own litterboxes as well as seperate food & water dishes. Heaven forbid if they have to poop in the same box or eat/drink from the same dish! Well this week I "forgot" to change out the litterboxes......it's been a busy week, that's the only excuse I have. Well suffice to say, "Scooter" (Mr. Fatty) was not pleased.....

The other morning I was extremely tired, and as I stood in the kitchen trying to decide if I should make some coffee or just go back to bed....hubby woke up and came walking out to the kitchen. He could tell how tired I was, so he began to make the coffee. This is the verbal exchange that took place:

Hubby: "how did you sleep?"
Me: "not that well....and you?"
Hubby: "ok I guess....oh by the way, you forgot to change the litterboxes didn't you?"
Me: "why?"
Hubby: "well Scooter isn't happy....he pooped in his drink sink."

WHAT?!?!

Me: "are you freakin' kiddding me? Did you clean the sink & remove the turd?"
Him: "no, I wanted you to see it so you could have a talk with Scooter."
Me: "I've seen cat turds before, you didn't have to leave it for me."
Him: "well I figured you'd need to see it so you could have a talk with the cat about it."
Me: "seriously? like the freakin' cat is going to give a happy wet rat's ass what I have to say about him pooping in the sink. gee thanks, what am I now the cat turd whisperer?"

Seriously? Like I'm going to lecture the cat about where he decides to poop, and the cat will actually listen to me. I just stood there thinking....why does this type of stuff happen when I'm tired and haven't had a chance to consume any coffee yet? Oh yeah, and by the way....thanks for being a jerk and leaving the turd in the sink for me to clean out. Sigh....I can already tell it's going to be a long day.


So I go into the other room to where the cat's drink sink is.....and begin to lecture the cat. Yes, I actually lectured the cat....he just sat there with this snarky look on his little cat face, meowing at me almost as if he was saying "blah blah blah - just clean my litterbox already." I swear he even rolled his eyes at me! As I'm lecturing him, I look into the sink for the "evidence" -- fully expecting to find a cat turd. But instead I see this black piece of plastic -- it's one of the mini Star Wars ink pens that came as a prize in one of the many boxes of cereal I had bought a few weeks ago for the kids. So no cat turd -- just a mini Darth Maul ink pen that apparently looks a lot like a cat turd at 5:30 in the morning when my hubby strolls through without his glasses on. Seriously?! Time for hubby to get his eyes checked.

I pick up the turd shaped ink pen, apologize to the cat profusely (now he'll really have an attitude since he just got a major lecture for no reason)....and walk back out to the kitchen where my oh so innocent husband is standing with a cup of coffee. I'm tempted to just drop the turd shaped ink pen into his coffee cup, but I don't.....instead I toss it at him and say "since when does Darth Maul look like a cat turd?" Hubby just laughs......and for the rest of the day we take turns tormenting each other with that stupid Darth Maul cat turd shaped mini ink pen and apologizing to the cat to avoid having him seek payback......yes we have warped senses of humor and a very spoiled fat cat, and I have no doubt that the cat will find a way to pay us back.

Ok perhaps you won't see the humor in any of this.....but I still chuckle thinking about it. No wonder Darth Maul was a bad guy....I'm sure it's hard to be anything but when you look like a cat turd.

Pets

I hope everyone had a great Father's Day.....seems like this summer has been flying by fast thus far. Today's blog will be about "pets"....and sharing a bit of humor in regards to our beloved furry family members.

Long before Taz was born, hubby & I decided to adopt a pet from the local animal shelter. Ok, when I say "hubby & I"....I really mean that it was just me -- I never really discussed the idea with him...just sort of surprised him with the cat. I went in that day to drop off our huge stack of newspapers that the recycle company "forgot" to pick up....and decided to walk through the rows of cages and check out the various animals. Since we lived in an apartment at the time, adopting a dog of any type was out of the question....so I went into the "cat room". The shelter was over capacity for cats -- they were crammed 8+ into the metal cages that lined the walls of the cat room.

I remember stopping in front of one cage while talking to one of the employees about how they were over capacity, when suddenly this scrawny poop-covered kitten reached it's paws through the bars of the cage and tried to grab my shoulder, as if to say "hey pick me -- yeah me, the one covered in poop!" I have to admit, at first that kitten was UGLY....not to mention, very tiny and covered head to tail in poop. Suffice to say, he didn't "smell" that great either....but there was something about the way he kept reaching through the bars at me, trying to get my attention -- and meowing that sad little meow sound. I told the employee -- "I'll take that one", the employee looked at me and said "which one?" -- I pointed to poopie paws and said "that one, covered in poop." The employee told me to go out to the desk to fill out the adoption paperwork while they took "Mr. Poopie Paws" back to be cleaned up & given his first set of shots. In what seemed like just a few minutes, the employee brought out this tiny, cut, furry kitten....I paused for a moment before reaching out to take ahold of him, uncertain as to if it was the same kitten I had picked out....because to be honest, he looked completely different once he was actually clean.

I took "Mr. Poopie Paws" home with me....at first hubby wasn't thrilled, but he quickly warmed up to him. Who wouldn't love a little ball of fur that just wanted to snuggle? And he was beyond cute....his tail was as long as his entire body! Somehow, as we struggled to find a name for him....he managed to show us that "Mr. Poopie" seemed to be the perfect fit. He had a very unique and yet somewhat quirky personality, and in the beginning....some extremely horrible GAS issues. Yes you read that correctly....I believe he was the only cat on the planet capable of passing gas. It seemed like every step he took, he would "fart"....and not some cute little kitten fart, I'm talking a fart that could peal the paint right off the walls! It was funny in some ways, because it took hubby and I a few days to figure out that it was the cat....each time we'd smell the "odor", we'd blame each other for "breaking wind" without warning. Finally we discovered that the smell was coming from the cat. It took a few trips to the vet to discover the cause of his gas issues -- turns out he was allergic to the type of cat food I was buying. Who knew cats could be allergic to seafood flavored cat food?!? After changing brands, the gas issue went away....however the name "Mr. Poopie" stuck.

As I said, "Mr. Poopie" was very unique and had a quirky personality. He would do all sorts of "tricks" as well....like run and pull the cord for the closet light in the bedroom when the alarm clock went off in the morning.....and try to hide in my fern plants (remember that Bugs Bunny cartoon where the natives pop out from behind the bush just as 'doctor Livingston' a.k.a. Bugs Bunny comes walking through the jungle?) -- well that was him, and he was so cute and comical about it....just cracked us up. He would also perch himself on the top of the recliner chair, and hover over the shoulder of anyone silly enough to sit in said chair....almost like a parrot on the shoulder of a pirate. When Taz was born, "Mr. Poopie" acted as if he were his baby and not ours....he would sleep right next to the crib, and if Taz made the slightest sound....he would come running into our room....jump on the bed and howl and bite at us until we got up. (Picture "Lassie" as a cat -- that was "Mr. Poopie"). Mr. Poopie was so gentle with all of the kids....and so protective too, almost like a guard dog in many ways.

I remember once a bee got into the house somehow.....son #3 was just a baby, and I had him laying on his blanket on the living room floor. The bee landed next to him and was crawling across the blanket towards him -- suddenly "Mr. Poopie" sprinted across the room and snatched that bee up into his mouth before I could swat at it with the fly swatter. That cat sat there with his jaws clenched shut, allowing the bee to sting him over and over again in his mouth -- just long enough for me to move the baby out of the way. Then "Mr. Poopie" proceeded to "chew" the bee -- and refused to open his mouth until the bee was dead. Of course bees weren't the only thing "Mr. Poopie" liked to eat.....he loved Doritos! I remember one night hearing this horrible sound in the kitchen....I walked out, turned on the light and there was "Mr. Poopie" completely inside the bag of Doritos -- his tail was the only thing sticking out of the family sized bag of chips! As I tried to pull him out of the bag, he dug his paws in and was fighting to stay in it -- trying to devour as many chips as possible before I was successful in pulling him out of the bag. He was covered head to butt in orange chip dust.....I swear he sprained his tongue trying to lick that stuff off his fur as fast as possible!

He also loved that shiny silver tinsel stuff that you put on the Christmas trees....and balloons.....yes, he ate both items and that is why they are no longer allowed in our house! There is something very funny about seeing a cat run across the room with shiny silver string and/or a balloon hanging out of his rear end! And yes, I did take him to the vet to make sure he "passed" everything and there were no blockages. "Mr. Poopie" lived a long and happy life....he was with us up until 2 years ago, when he developed feline leukemia. When his illness got to the point where we realized there was nothing more the vet could do to help him, we decided it was time to have him put to sleep to avoid any suffering or pain. It was a difficult choice to make -- and of course we were all heartbroken. Over the years "Mr. Poopie" became more than a pet.....he was part of the family. Thus when he passed, we decided to hold a funeral -- complete with a kitty sized home-made coffin, a few of his favorite toys and treats added inside.....and we had our neighbor come over with their backhoe (one nice thing about living in the country) and dig a hole to bury "Mr. Poopie" in.....we wanted something deep enough so no other animals could dig him up. After he was buried and we had our little graveside memorial service, hubby and the kids found a HUGE field rock (a large boulder) and with the help of the neighbor and their backhoe, it was moved to our yard and placed on top of "Mr. Poopie's" grave....then the kids & I used craft paint to write his name & the dates on it, just like a real tombstone.

Over the years other pets have come & gone, but none have stuck around for very long due to one reason or another....seems like "Mr. Poopie" was the only one. After he died, we decided to adopt another cat. She looks a lot like "Mr. Poopie"....same markings, etc and similar personality. Our little "Princess" is a real diva....always wants to snuggle and be the center of attention. After my mom died, we adopted her cat as well....but thus far "Princess" doesn't get along very well with him. He is a huge orange cat....when I say huge, I mean FAT.....reminds me in many ways of the cartoon cat Garfield. And of course, "Garfield" a.k.a. "Mr. Fatty" has a unique personality as well and can be very entertaining.

Over the years we've tried adopting a few dogs....but none ever seemed to work out or stick around for very long for one reason or another. The first dog ran off.....the second was a destructive chewing machine and had to find a new home, and the third was jealous of everyone and everything -- thus he went away too. Hubby decided after "Mr. Poopie" died, we needed a new guardian.....thus he talked me into giving the idea of "getting a dog" another try. Now, I've never been a fan of Labs.....not sure why, just really don't care for them.....I think part of it is because every Lab I've ever met has been hyper and annoying. Anyhow, we responded to an ad in the newspaper....the person claimed that this puppy was a German Shepherd or some other type of breed, but when I got there it was very obvious that the puppy was indeed a Black Lab....actually a Lab and "short hair" mixed mutt. When I first saw it, part of me wanted to say "umm, no thanks" and get back into the car and drive home....but the kids were with me, and of course the guy showed them the puppy....thus there was no getting out of this -- it was coming home with us whether I liked it or not.

Now, although I'm not a fan of Labs....there was something about "Moses" that I found interesting. From the moment he and Taz met, there seemed to be an instant bond....it was as if "Moses" could sense something. I had read somewhere that Labs were being used as service dogs for Autistic children, thus I thought I'd try training "Moses" to work with Taz. Although this dog has it's quirks (can be hyper at times and loves to chew things he shouldn't), he has been an AMAZING guard dog -- and has developed into a pretty good service dog if I do say so myself, especially considering the only "training" he's had has been through what I've taught him.

About 6 months after we got "Moses", Taz started going through this phase of trying to sneak out of the house. Although "Moses" was technically still only a puppy, he was quite large for his age and breed. Whenever Taz would try to sneak out, not only would "Moses" bark this strange bark -- a unique bark that he only used when Taz was doing something he shouldn't -- but "Moses" would also chase after him. One day Taz tried to sneak out into the backyard, and "Moses" was hot on his heels.....he had him on the ground before he could reach and unlock the gate. Of course "Moses" didn't hurt him, he just sort of football player style tackled him, and then sat on top of him barking. A few days later while hubby was outside working in the garden, Taz decided to try to sneak out....but once again, "Moses" stopped him -- parking his big butt right in front of the door and barking every time Taz tried to get him to move. After that, Taz quickly realized that "Moses" would never let him go outside alone, and would always tattle on him by barking.

Since then the two of them have developed a strong bond...."Moses" seems to understand that there is something "special" about Taz, and Taz has learned that "Moses" will always be there to protect him and keep him safe. In the process of forming their bond, and what little bit of training I've done....Taz has taught "Moses" a few tricks....like how to fetch, shake hands, sit, etc. "Moses" has been good for Taz.....not to mention he's been a great guard dog. At age 2, he is HUGE...when he stands on his hind legs, he's almost as tall as a grown man.....and he's all muscle too. He has several different barks....still that one special one for Taz. In many ways, "Moses" is a big baby....he still tries to sit on our laps like he did when he was a puppy, and is full of energy! Yet even though he can be so sweet and gentle, I have no doubt that he would rip someone apart if they ever tried to hurt one of the kids....especially Taz.

A few weeks ago, we had a salesman pull into the driveway, all of us were in the yard at the time...and of course Taz went running over to see what was in the truck (it looked like a big ice cream truck). Out here in the country we get all sorts of weird sales people showing up -- and this guy was some type of meat salesman. Seriously -- he had all types of meat in his truck, like the bulk packaged stuff. The guy took ahold of Taz's arm to tell him that -- no, he couldn't climb into the truck -- and when "Moses" saw the guy holding Taz's arm, he flipped out and jumped the fence (a 6 foot high fence)! He was barking & running towards the two of them at full speed.....I was less than a foot from them. I screamed at the guy to let go of Taz's arm. He saw "Moses" running towards them -- quickly let go of Taz -- and jumped back into his truck. Once we put "Moses" inside, the guy asked me if he would have bitten him....I just smiled and said "I don't know -- but I guarantee if you wouldn't have let go of my son, that dog would have ripped your arm from the socket."

Now I'm not 100% sure as to if "Moses" would have actually bitten the guy or not....he's never bitten anyone before, however since he's very protective of the kids, especially Taz.....I think that IF he thought someone was trying to hurt Taz or one of the other kids, then he probably would rip that person apart. I remember the guy asked why we named him "Moses" -- I honestly don't remember how we came up with that name -- but I told the guy: "because if anyone touches my kids, then just like Moses from the Bible -- he will send you to the promised land!" I've never seen a grown man's face turn white like that before....in some ways it was funny. I told him that since he grabbed my son's arm like that, I'm pretty sure the dog will never forget it -- thus it's probably a good idea if he never comes back to try to sell the crap he had on his truck, because more than likely the dog will go after him if he ever returns. I guess that is one way to get rid of a door-to-door salesman and guarantee that they won't return.

For those who may be considering a service dog or some other type of pet....I highly recommend getting one. Not only will it be a good way to teach your child responsibility (by having them help with taking care of the pet -- feeding, watering, etc), but it will help with the socialization skills as well. Since I grew up on a farm and have trained a lot of dogs, horses, etc. I feel that I'm capable of training a "service dog", however training might not be as easy for someone else, thus I suggest finding a good company to deal with or a dog that has already been trained by a professional.

Daddy

Since Father's Day is almost here (as of the moment that I'm writing this)....I think today's post will be dedicated to all of the great Dads that are out there! However, before I talk about the great dads....I need to rant just a little bit about the dads who aren't that great.

Yes I know there are some dads who totally suck (and to be fair, there are some moms who do as well) -- they can't handle everything that comes with the life of Autism -- thus they take the "easy way out" and choose to walk away. Now before anyone gets their panties all in a wad -- yes I know, dealing with Autism isn't easy -- trust me, I know that. However, as the saying goes "if you lay down to make a baby, then stand up and be a daddy!"

That is YOUR child -- regardless of what abilities said child may or may not have -- it is YOUR responsibility to love that child, raise that child, provide for that child, and protect that child....period! Would you give up on your "typical" child and walk away if they did something to upset you or disappoint you? No you wouldn't -- so man up -- accept your responsibilities and be a freakin' parent! As my dad always said, "if you aren't ready for the responsibility of being a parent -- then keep it in your pants & keep them zipped!"

As I've said before, dealing with Autism isn't easy -- some people can't handle it -- I understand that. It takes a strong person to deal with some of the things that can occur on a daily basis with Autism. However, in my oh so humble opinion....you do NOT just walk away and/or toss your child aside just because they aren't "perfect" in your eyes -- you do NOT give up on that child, no matter what. You helped to create that child, thus you are responsible for that child. And if you make the choice to do that -- to walk away & give up -- then you are a coward -- plain and simple. Some people may disagree with me on that, but oh well. It's like taking your marriage vows -- if you help to create a child, then you are in this for the long haul -- for better or worse, for the next 18+ years -- there is no guarantee that it will be all sunshine and roses -- so be a real man and have the balls to deal with whatever happens!

Ok enough about the bad dads -- this post was suppose to be for the great dads that are out there. I'm talking about the dads who are there for the good & the bad times, the tears and the joy, every step of the way.....loving their child & supporting that child 100%. Thus the remainder of this post is for all of the great dads -- you know who you are! And I would like to dedicate the rest of this post to three of the greatest dads ever.....

My dad:   My dad was truly an amazing man. He always....and I mean ALWAYS....put his family first. He would go without, just so his family never had to. He would work 16-18 hour days....do whatever he had to do....to always make sure that there was a roof over our heads, food on the table, and clothes on our back. Although he didn't always say those three little words (I love you) out loud that often.....we always knew how much he did love us and he showed it in so many ways. He was always there when I needed him -- he always supported me & stood by me, no matter how many times I screwed up, screamed "I hate you", or did stupid stuff to disappoint him. 

I was and always will be a "daddy's girl" -- very few men can compare to my dad.....many have tried, and many have failed. He was my rock....my protector....my "go to" guy for advice, wisdom, etc. -- and the one I always knew I could count on to have my back no matter what. I lost my dad to leukemia many years ago.....I was just thinking about it the other day, and it's hard to believe it's been almost 20 years now. Wow...where has the time gone? It seems like only yesterday.....I remember the last time I saw him before he died. He hugged me tightly and said "I love you, don't ever forget that." My gut instincts should have told me right then & there that something was wrong.....after all, dad had just been to the doctor's office a few days before for some tests to determine why his "cold" had gotten worse and wouldn't go away.....and I could count on one hand the number of times dad had hugged me that tightly & said those words.....but I just gave him a big hug and said "I love you too, I'll see you on Sunday." Little did I realize when I said goodbye to him that day, that Sunday would never come....he died just a few short days later, ironically the day before I was to drive down to visit him....yep, he died on Saturday. 

Yes it still seems like only yesterday even though it's been almost 20 years. Not a day goes by that I don't miss him.....I wish he was still here to give me advice, help with repair issues around the house, etc. I wish he could have met my husband (I know he would have approved) and lived long enough to meet his wonderful grandsons.....I know he would have spoiled them rotten and would have been so supportive of Taz. And I know, he would have put a foot in the rear end of the "family" members who treat Taz like crap....no way would dad have allowed them to act like they have! From time to time, I think I catch a glimpse of him when I see that twinkle in the eyes of one of our children......they have their grandpa's sense of humor, his compassion, etc. Yes he was an amazing man.....my daddy......and I miss him so much!

Next: My Father-In-Law  - yes he was also an amazing man & a great dad from what I've been told. His parenting style was a bit different from what my dad did, but I've learned over the years that he was a lot like my own dad in many ways. He died before hubby & I met, so I never had the chance to meet him in person. But from what I've been told....I'm sure he & I would have gotten along just great. My father-in-law was a hard working man, and did his best to provide for his family. He didn't wear his heart on his sleeve.....was a soft-spoken man, and didn't always express his emotions. He enjoyed working in his garden & was a huge baseball fan.

He was Polish, thus when we speak about him we often call him "Dzadzi" (pronounced "ja gee") which is the Polish word for "grandpa". I remember when Taz & our other son were little, they used to sit and just chatter away to "someone"....one day I asked who they were talking to. They had both looked at me with huge grins and said "Dzadzi". I had asked both of them to describe what Dzadzi looked like (at the time neither of them had seen a photo of him)....and they described him to an exact "T" -- how freaky is that?! Thus I have no doubt, that even though their Dzadzi and grandpa (my dad) both passed away before the boys were born, both men were somehow there watching over the little guys & giving them love....angel style.

I discovered while hubby & I were dating, that my father-in-law served in the military during WWII.....according to family members, "dad" hardly ever spoke about his time in the military. History is something that has always fascinated me, thus throughout our marriage....I've done all that I could to learn more about my FIL's military service & hopefully help to find some answers for my hubby & his sister. After my MIL passed away, I discovered some of dad's military papers among her things, and also discovered that due to a glitch -- although dad was awarded the Bronze Star, he never actually received it. Thus I was a woman on a mission.....I was determined to learn all that I could, and do what I could to have that medal awarded to the family.

Throughout the years, we've heard a few stories and have learned a lot -- like the fact that dad's first "battle" was storming the beach at Normandy....his job was to help take out the machine gun nests that were along the cliffs. He saved many lives that day. During his service, he saw many battles throughout Germany and France.....and was wounded during one of them, thus receiving the award of a Purple Heart medal. We also learned that at some point during the war, dad was taken prisoner & tortured by the Nazi soldiers -- not sure how he got away, but he bore the physical scars of that time for the remainder of his life. One of his last "battles" was assisting with liberating one of the concentration camps....it gives me chills to think of how many lives he saved on that day as well. I discovered over the course of my search, that not only was dad awarded 1 Purple Heart....but two of them, along with his Bronze Star and several other medals. We are so proud of him and thankful for his service.....yes my father-in-law was an amazing man and a great dad!

And last but definitely not least....the #1 "World's Greatest Dad" award goes to.....

My Husband:  Yes, my husband. He is a mixture of my dad & his. He is hard working, supportive, dedicated, compassionate, and an amazing husband & father. He is my rock -- my best friend -- my soul mate. He loves all of our boys and does everything he can to make sure they know it. He always puts his family first, often neglecting his own needs in the process. He will go to hell and back for our kids -- especially Taz.

The day Taz was born -- the look on my husband's face as the doctor held him up and said "here is your son"....well that moment is forever etched in my memory. It was like the scene from the movie "The Lion King" -- he held Taz in his arms, and you could see the pride and love wash over him like a tidal wave. The day of Taz's diagnosis -- hearing the words "your son has Autism" -- was like someone stuck a knife into my husband's heart. But he didn't walk away -- he didn't give up. He has been by my side every step of the way.....sharing the laughter and tears....sharing the good times and bad. He has fought the school district & ISD, battled with insurance companies, and stood his ground for our son (he does the same for all of our children). I have no doubt in my mind, that if he could take Taz's Autism -- and give this disorder to himself, thus allowing Taz the chance to have a "normal" life -- I have no doubt in my mind that hubby would do it in a heartbeat.

As I said, he will go to to hell and back for our kids -- he will move Heaven and Earth to provide for their needs & make sure they never have to feel one ounce of pain or sorrow. He shows just how much he loves them through his words and his actions. I have no doubt that he would give his own life to keep our kids safe & happy. During this journey of Autism, one thing Taz developed was a love of Nascar. Hubby pulled every string that he could -- called in every favor possible from his business associates -- and arranged for Taz to have a private 1-on-1 meet & greet with his idol and all-time favorite Nascar driver....Dale Jarrett. Somehow, the local newspaper found out about it (ok, I'll fess up -- I called them) -- and there was a photo and an article on the front page of the sports section about the whole thing as well. I wonder if Taz will ever fully understand & appreciate just how far his dad went & what he had to do, to make that moment happen?

Years ago, hubby used his contacts to obtain items needed for Taz to work at home. Hubby converted our den into a classroom -- complete with school desks, phonics charts, an ABC chart, etc. -- you name it, he obtained it. He helped with the picture cards and working with Taz to re-develop his verbal skills. When I was tired and just feeling burned out --- hubby took over, he somehow found the energy to keep me going.....and he helped me to "think outside the box" so many times....coming up with creative ways to help Taz learn. When Taz became a picky eater & developed his horrible gag reflex (which at times would result in projectile vomit episodes), hubby used his amazing chef skills to work with Taz to try to expand his food choices. The garden was hubby's idea as well.

Although hubby had never been camping in his life -- and honestly had no desire to ever go.....he put aside his own feelings, and agreed to give it a try after I shared with the kids my special childhood memories of going camping with my parents & they begged us to take them & give camping a try. We started out with baby steps at first -- renting a cabin for a weekend. Then moved up to renting a "rustic" cabin for a few days.....since then, hubby has purchased all of the camping gear needed -- sleeping bags, cookware, and even a tent! The kids loved going camping, and have been eagerly planning our next trip....and although hubby probably won't admit it, I think he enjoys it now just as much as they do. It's a fairly cheap vacation thing to do as a family -- and one way to build lots of wonderful memories.

So yes, my husband deserves the "Father of The Year" award! We have laughed together, cried together, shared our hopes and our fears....and have been able to vent and say the things that we would never say out loud or to anyone else. He is the best husband in the world -- my rock -- my best friend.....and my soul mate. He is an amazing father & would do anything in the world for our kids -- he always puts their needs ahead of his own, and like a father bear -- he will rip apart anyone that ever tries to hurt our kids. And that is just one of the many reasons why I love him. So with that, I'll end this post and wish everyone a very "Happy Father's Day"!

The Funny Stuff

One of the things I've learned while on this crazy roller coaster ride called Autism.....you have GOT to have a sense of humor! If not, the stress and chaos of life can drive you completely insane. Of course you also have to develop a thick skin & learn which battles are worth fighting, and which ones you just have to walk away from....because there are some folks in this world who just have no common sense and will say some of the rudest and dumbest things ever -- but I'll save that rant for another blog post. Today's post is about having a sense of humor and all of the funny things that can occur while on the journey of Autism. 

As I said, this journey isn't all heartache and tears....there are many happy moments, and some that are downright hilarious. Many times, you just have to take a step back -- look at the situation -- and try not to wet your pants from laughing so hard. Of course it helps if you have a dry or what some may call a warped sense of humor. (sort of like a cross between George Carlin & Larry the Cable Guy) For example, the Vaseline crop circle story I shared in the post "Why Mommy Doesn't Take Naps".....if you haven't read that post yet, I suggest you do so. Yes I'll admit, at the time I did not see the humor in it -- but now I'm able to because every time I share that story -- the people I share it with end up laughing hysterically. Especially if I'm talking to them in person -- face to face, thus they are able to see my facial expressions and hand gestures as I share the story. Those who know me will testify to the fact that I am a very animated person when I talk -- lots of facial expressions, hand gestures, and the occasional Aussie accent (no I'm not from Australia). Of course in the Autism world, that may be considered "stim" behavior...but for the sake of argument, we'll just call it being animated ok?

Another example is when I spoke about our garden in a previous post & how son #2 flipped out over Taz eating raw veggies that may or may not have had a little bit of garden dirt on them. The verbal exchange between son #2 and I was rather hilarious....I was doing the whole "zip it" routine from the Austin Powers movie (for those who have seen the movie, I'm sure you know the part I'm talking about -- where Doctor Evil is trying to politely tell his son to shut up -- if you haven't seen the movie, you should watch it because it is totally hilarious!). Anyhow, that was another funny moment in our lives....and it appears as though son #2 has developed the same warped sense of humor that I have.....because over the years he's popped off with some great remarks, especially a lot of 1-liner type things that totally crack me up. Actually all of the kids have a great sense of humor....

The one thing that I admire most about Taz is his ability to be totally honest and sometimes even a bit blunt, because there are times that his remarks can be quite hilarious. I remember once when mom came to stay with us for a visit. I was trying to explain the whole concept of why we recycle to one of the younger kids....and I was also talking about how some items can be repurposed or "upcycled". As I was attempting to provide examples of items that were old but could be "upcycled" or recycled into something else, Taz looked at me and in a totally serious and matter-of-fact tone said "so can we recycle grandma?" Both mom & I burst out laughing! A few weeks ago one of the joke sites I visit often on Facebook had a picture/joke posted that was of a little kid taking to his mom, and it said "mom there's someone at the door collecting old stuff to recycle....can I give them grandma?" On that particular day I was really missing my mom and feeling a bit sad, but when I saw that picture/joke -- I couldn't help but burst out laughing because it reminded me of Taz's remarks. It's almost as if mom was using her angel skills to tap me on the shoulder and say "remember the happy times".

While our youngest was in pre-school, I decided it would be easier and help to save on the cost of fuel....if I just hung around the school and helped out rather than driving back & forth to home for those few short hours each day. While he was in his pre-school class, I worked as a "classroom mom" in my other son's class (plus a few other classrooms as needed). I would have the general eduction teachers in stitches on a daily basis with some of my one-liners and sarcasm. I'm pretty sure I suggested the use of shock collars and/or a cattle prod one day. I could not believe how many students acted like pure demon spawn....those poor Gen Ed teachers! One little cherub in particular, whom we'll call "Kyle" really pushed the teachers to the limit on some days, thus they would have me deal with him during my volunteer time. (To clarify - Kyle was not an AI student, he was a general eduction student & just a total brat!) Kyle would try to do everything possible to see if he could get me to break -- I'm pretty sure his former teacher "retired" (translation: had a nervous breakdown) because of him. One day he walked up and said "Mrs. S, you have big boobs!" The other students just gasped and the teacher looked as if she'd faint....I just smiled and said "Thanks Kyle, I got them at Walmart."

Another day sweet little Kyle was wiping snot all over the place instead of using a tissue like he was suppose to. I just smiled and said "Kyle, use a tissue please -- don't make me go out to the car and get my taser." When that didn't work, I told the teacher I'd be happy to load a squirt gun with some hand sanitizer and just squirt him with it at random. By mid-year precious little Kyle realized that he had met his match....he began to buckle down and focus on his work, his behavior improved, and he was actually using his manners! At the parent/teacher conference, his mom asked how on earth the teacher had gotten his behavior to improve -- she said "we've tried everything and nothing worked!" The teacher laughed and told her about me. Kyle's mom thanked me later that year....in some ways it was funny. The reason I find humor in that is because Kyle's mom claimed they had "tried everything" -- when in fact they just let Kyle run wild and do whatever he wanted to do (she basically admitted that). He was starved for attention and someone to show that they cared....and it was obvious that no one had bothered to teach him good manners, or about healthy eating -- seriously, this kid brought a Red Bull as his drink on one of the field trips! Kyle's mom tried to fool everyone but I could see right through her -- thus the reason I found humor in her comments. Don't claim that you're "doing everything" when in fact you deserve an award for being the world's worst parent!

The teachers all seemed to love to try to pass their most difficult students off to me -- to have me work with them during my volunteer time. One teacher asked why I never went into the education field, I laughed and said "my own kids drive me nuts on some days, do you honestly think I'd want to deal with the kids of 30 complete strangers all day long?! I'm pretty sure the district wouldn't approve of my teaching methods anyhow & they couldn't afford that much duct tape in their budget." Of course I was joking.....just more of my dry/warped sense of humor. I wasn't able to volunteer this year, and all of the teachers kept begging me to come back -- it seems like every time I did go to the school for something, there was a mob of staff members around me pleading for me to come back to help in their classrooms. Somehow I earned the nickname "The Terminator"....not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Another funny moment.....our youngest entered the all-day Kindergarten program this year, which meant that FINALLY mommy would have some "me time" during the day to relax and get things accomplished! Oh joy, I was really looking forward to that moment especially since all 4 kids would be in school the entire day. Over the years I've joked about what I would do on the day they all got on the bus -- somehow my comments went from "I'll relax" to something like "I'll be doing a naked happy dance in the yard" (which is another line from one of my favorite movies). Well on the first day of school, once the kids were all ready....we went out the door and stood anxiously at the end of the driveway waiting for the buses to arrive. Taz's bus was the last to arrive, and as he climbed onto the bus and moved towards his seat, the bus driver & bus aide both asked what I'd be doing now that all 4 kids  were in school full time. Before I could respond, Taz smiled and said loud & proud for everyone to hear: "she's going to start dancing naked!" Oh....my....Lord, I wanted to crawl under a rock and hide! Yet I couldn't help but giggle a little bit. The bus aide was trying not to laugh hysterically as she buckled Taz into his seat (she had already heard the "happy dance" story a million times before). But the bus driver seemed a bit confused (obviously he hadn't heard the story, thus he thought Taz was serious in his remark), so he just smiled at me and said "oh....well I hear they make good money at the place downtown.....good luck with that." (FYI the "place downtown" is a strip club!) As the bus pulled away I refrained from doing my "happy dance". I walked back towards the house, wondering how many people Taz would repeat that phrase to throughout the day. I also wondered how many people within the school district by the end of the day would think that I've begun an oh so promising career as a stripper/pole dancer! The mental note to myself that day: watch what I say around Taz.

Another recent funny happened this past school year. Taz's aide Miss "A" has been working with him since he was at LTC (except for the short time frame when the "powers that be" within the school district thought it would be best to switch the aides around). Thus when he entered Middle School, he had a new aide and I fought like crazy to get Miss "A" re-assigned to him. Now Miss "A" has been there through the good & bad, all of the ups and downs....she has shared the tears and laughter with us....she has basically watched Taz grow up. She understands Taz -- knows what most of the "triggers" are that will send him into full blown meltdown mode, and knows what types of things will help to calm him. Well when puberty started, Taz began to "cycle" back into some old behaviors.....some of which we haven't experienced in years....and things that used to work to help to calm him, no longer did. Having a different aide, someone who didn't "get" him and know him like Miss "A" did, didn't help things any.

One day I was called to the school because he was having a severe meltdown. Miss "A" was in the building working with another child, and heard what was going on -- so she walked into the office at the same time as I did, hoping she could help in some way. The other staff members had tried everything to calm him, but he just continued to escalate -- thus the reason they called me. As we opened the door to the Principal's office -- we were both shocked to see that Taz was in the corner screaming, kicking, etc and he had taken off all of his clothes! (that is a meltdown behavior that hasn't happened in years). Needless to say I was shocked, and part of me wanted to just turn around and run back to the car! I had a memory flash through my mind of the "naked phase" -- which by the way, is followed by the "poop Picasso" phase....(did I tell you about that? Oh well, if not I'll talk about that later)....needless to say I did NOT want to go through that whole experience again! Well Miss "A" walked over to him and said "hey Taz, I haven't seen you in a while -- what have you been up to?" Then she leaned down and whispered something into his ear. As if someone flipped a switch, Taz immediately calmed down and started to put his clothes back on. Afterwards I asked Miss "A" what she had whispered to him....I almost wet my pants from laughing when she told me (sorry I can't repeat it here, cause some folks might not find the humor in it). But suffice to say, that was the last time (thus far) that Taz has stripped naked during a meltdown!

Thus the moral to this post......you have to have a sense of humor! Otherwise, you might end up in a padded room somewhere singing show tunes to the walls and making macaroni pictures all day. Which in some ways wouldn't be all that bad I guess, especially if you like show tunes and/or macaroni. Seriously though....life is short, so take the time to laugh and find the humor in things.

Family

You know the old saying "blood is thicker than water"? Well that's not always true.....I've learned that over the years, and the full realization hit me during mom's funeral. As I mentioned before, I realized on the drive home that day that it was time to make some changes....

It wasn't long after Taz's diagnosis that things began to change. First it was the constant remarks of "you just need to discipline him more" and "how can the doctor's be sure he has Autism?" -- then the never ending parenting "tips" and suggestions came....

1) "He needs more discipline."
2) "Just put the food on the table, if he won't eat it then let him go hungry - he'll learn not to be so picky and/or make himself gag at the sight of certain foods."
3) "He should be on medication."
4) "Maybe he needs a higher dose of medication?"
5) "Are you disciplining him? If you paddle his butt he'll stop doing that."  

Blah blah blah....the list goes on and on. It wasn't long before the "family" began to treat him like he was some type of outcast.....like they were afraid if they interacted with him or allowed their children to be near him, then their precious children might "catch" his Autism. Taz's cousins wouldn't play with him.....they would run off every time he tried to go near them. They were afraid of his meltdowns -- they thought he was "weird"....and their parents did nothing to try to educate them or teach them how to be compassionate & accepting of their cousin. Of course how could they teach their own children how to be accepting, when they didn't accept him? They treated Taz the same way....they called him names like "retard" and "rainman".....they made jokes about "riding the short bus".....the list goes on and on, suffice to say they were cruel and they just didn't care. Of course in their opinion, I was taking things "too personally" and/or being too emotional -- some of them didn't see anything wrong with their own behaviors & comments.

After a while, we stopped attending family gatherings......we'd find some "excuse" as to why we couldn't attend. Or if by chance we did attend -- something important like a wedding or other huge event, we would find an excuse to leave early.....just to avoid the rude comments, dirty looks, etc. from those who were suppose to be "family". My mom noticed the way the others treated Taz......it used to break her heart and make her cry. Even though she herself didn't fully understand what Autism was, she loved him no matter what and accepted him for who he was --- Autism and all. And he loved his grandma.....he was so protective of her and so careful around her.....I remember the times he would gently take her arm and help her walk once she wasn't able to move around like she used to....or he would hold the doors open for her, run and grab something so she wouldn't have to get up & try to walk to get it, etc. I remember once when she came to visit for a week....she was having difficulty walking and really wanted to go to the store. That particular store had what we called "stretched limo" shopping carts.....a bench seat and then a cart that had 2 child seats (it was basically like 1 & 1/2 shopping carts put together with a bench seat, very convenient in some ways but extremely difficult to maneuver). Taz volunteered to push the cart while his grandma sat on the bench seat.....she looked like a queen riding on a float, and he beamed with pride as he carefully pushed the cart up & down the aisles.

One incident that still brings tears to my eyes to think about it.....my siblings planned a surprise party for my mom's birthday (this happened several years ago).....and while at the party, Taz tried to run and join his younger cousins while they were playing. The other children ignored him -- wouldn't speak to him -- wouldn't play with him.....some called him names while others ran off to complain to their parents about him. I remember some of the remarks the other children made....."he's so weird, do I have to play with him?" Sadly, the adult "family" members weren't much better. Their attitude was "well kids will be kids". Sigh....I remember I was sitting at a table with mom behind some of the adult "family" members -- my husband was at the counter getting a refill on his cup of coffee......one of the kids ran over to their parent to complain about Taz and say they didn't want to play with him. Another "family" member said "so what is really WRONG with him?" And then it happened......

One "family" member said "he has Autism.....you know, he's like Rainman".....then they all laughed and another "family" member said "yeah like Rainman, I drive slow on the driveway." They continued to laugh and joke around about it -- making smart remarks about Taz and his Autism. I looked at them -- then looked at mom. She had also heard their conversation and remarks.....and with tears streaming down her face she looked at me and said "why can't they love him and accept him for the way he is? why do they have to say and do things like this?" It took every ounce of strength I had to choke back my own tears (and to keep from getting up and punching one of them in the face!), and I said "I don't know mom....I don't know." I looked towards where my husband had been standing (next to my former brother-in-law) directly behind the "family" that had made the remarks & who were still laughing and saying things to one another.....there was a mixture of anger and sadness on his face. Without saying a word to any of them, he walked over to where our kids were, took them by the hand and then walked past me and said "we're leaving".......then he took the kids and went out to the car. At that point, I wasn't able to hold back my tears.....I hugged mom and said "I'm sorry mom, we have to leave now." She nodded to let me know she understood why. Without a word to anyone else in the "family", I gathered our things and walked out the door. Years later some "family" members still swear that they did nothing wrong -- that their comments & laughter weren't meant in a negative way, while others deny that it even happened.

The years that followed were the same......more remarks from "family", more snarky looks, etc. As time went on, my visits "home" to see them all became less and less. I didn't want my son around them --- I didn't want any of our kids around them -- if that was the way the "family" was going to treat Taz. My brother understood -- he was one of the few who did accept Taz just the way he was, and he loved Taz more than words can express. On more than one occasion he spoke up -- but the "family" just didn't seem to understand how much their snotty looks, rude remarks, etc hurt -- they didn't seem to understand what was wrong about their behavior towards Taz. Their comments and behaviors used to make my brother so angry. Even when my husband & I discussed creating our Wills.....and I asked each "family" member the same question:  "If something happens to us, would you be willing to take the kids?"......each person I asked responded the same: "we'll take the other boys, but not Taz"......of course they each had some odd reason (excuse) for why they wouldn't take Taz, but regardless of their reasons (excuses).....it was basically all the same -- they didn't want him around.....not now and not ever. I didn't ask my brother -- only because at the time, he had just been diagnosed with his cancer. I know in my heart though, IF something would have happened to hubby & I when my brother was alive....he would have taken ALL of the boys.....he wouldn't have said no, especially when it came to making sure Taz was taken care of.

The remarks, snotty looks, etc. continued......at the last "family" gathering we had for Thanksgiving dinner.....at Frank's funeral......when we went to visit during the summer.....and the day of mom's funeral. Some family members made half-hearted apologies for their remarks & behaviors -- yet even afterwards, they still continued to talk about Taz and treat him like crap. Prior to Frank's death, remarks were made when the kids & I went down to visit mom.....some "family" members didn't think Taz should be around his grandma....they were concerned that he might somehow hurt her (perhaps during one of his meltdowns?) -- who knows.....their reasons & so called logic as to the "how" and "why" it might happen was a bunch of crap. They gave him funny looks, rolled their eyes when he'd try to talk to them, and continue with their remarks of "why isn't he on medicine?" and "you should discipline him more, he wouldn't act that way if you did"......it was the same thing over and over.....like a record that's stuck playing the same song over and over......only this time, I was tired of hearing it and wasn't in the mood to dance.

I blew up prior to mom's death, and then again shortly afterwards.....I stopped biting my tongue and said some things that needed to be said -- things that I had held inside for far too long. I spoke my mind and then some.....I went into full blown "bitch" mode -- I was one ticked off mom. Yes, I blew up -- I said some very cruel and hateful things, even going so far as to tell one sibling that I was dis-owning them. I was angry -- angry at the way my son had been treated by "family" for so many years......tired of their remarks, dirty looks, & snarky attitudes.....tired of him being the "joke" of the so called "family" for far too long. Tired of being made to feel like my son was somehow "unworthy" of their time & love......and that he was somehow defective compared to their so-called perfect precious children. Yes I was angry -- I had enough and I spoke my mind.

One "family" member had made a remark that we use our son's Autism as a crutch to try to get sympathy and pity from people -- Seriously?! I'm sure you can guess what my response was to that (I basically said "stick it where the sun don't shine!"). Of course I was also told that I was taking things too personally. Really?! How would you feel if someone treated your child like an outcast, made rude remarks and jokes, and basically treated him or her like crap? Hmmm....yeah ok, I guess I take that personally. That is MY child -- and I am a very protective mom. I won't let strangers treat him that way, and I sure as hell won't let "family" do it either.  So yeah, I spoke my mind and then some. Afterwards, the conversations between myself and "family" dwindled.....phone calls became few and far between, and no one has visited our house since mom's death. I earned the title of "family bitch" -- oh well, if sticking up for my child makes me a bitch then so be it. It took a lot of soul searching and thought....and I finally made the final break -- I terminated all contact with "family".

I decided if this is the way my son is going to be treated -- I don't need them in my life, and I sure as hell don't need them in his (or our other children's lives). I don't want my kids to be around people who will treat Taz like that and talk about him like that......you don't do that to someone you claim to love & care about......you don't do that to FAMILY! So now, our "family" consists of hubby, Taz, our other kids, and myself (and a few other relatives who haven't been cut out of our lives). As much as it hurt to cut the "family" out of our lives -- the realization hit me on the drive home from mom's funeral that day -- they will never change. They will never accept Taz for who he is and they have shown time and time again that when and IF we ever need them, they won't be there -- we can't count on them for support or anything else. In the months that followed, the reality hit me more and more -- their attitudes were the same and it tore me up inside. My anger & resentment was building towards them and I was turning into someone I didn't like -- and the stress & B.S. from "family" was beginning to cause health problems for me. As much as it hurt, I had to accept the facts. They will always treat Taz like some type of outcast, and I don't want people like that in his life. He has enough challenges ahead of him & he needs to have people in his life that will love him, support him, be there when needed, & accept him for who he is.

I just wish they could see Taz through my eyes, perhaps then they would realize what an amazing, smart, caring, & compassionate young man he is. Perhaps then they wouldn't see the Autism -- they would just see him? I just wish they could accept him and love him the way that his grandma & uncle did. But I know that will never happen -- so to save myself and Taz from further heartache, judgement, etc. I had to make the choice to cut them out of our lives. In doing that, I was able to let go of all of the pain, resentment, and anger I have felt for so long because of the way "family" has acted -- the way they have spoken about him -- and the way they have treated him for so long......and I'm at peace now. I'm sure there are some who feel that I'm a total bitch by cutting "family" out of our lives.....what I've written here is just the tip of the iceberg.....I could share so many more stories and then perhaps you'd understand what we've had to deal with for the last 10 years. But I won't go into that now....I know those who know us, and know what we've dealt with understand -- they've heard the stories and details of things (and they are disgusted by they way "family" has acted towards us & Taz and how we've been treated), and many have told me that I made the right decision. I know I haven't been perfect -- I know what my faults are & what my part was in all of this. Yet I'm able to admit my wrongs, I've apologized for things (even things that I didn't do!) and have tried time and time again -- only to get it thrown back in my face over and over. I just decided enough was enough -- I've let it all go......I'm moving on......I'm at peace with it all. I've accepted the fact that our "family" will never treat each other the way that mom & dad had wanted -- we will never be the way that we should.....and any chance or hope of that happening died the day that mom died. She was the "glue" that held us together -- now that she's gone, so is what's left of the dream of "family". So now, my focus will be on my true family -- my husband, our other children, and especially Taz.

What's Next?

So....where do we go from here? I know it's been almost a month since my last blog entry....sorry about that. This time of year is super crazy with all of the school events, field trips, etc taking place plus it's IEP season....and I've been busy trying to put together the info that I will need for our upcoming IEP meeting. And to be totally honest, the last 2 blog posts (about dealing with the deaths of my mom & brother) really took a lot out of me emotionally. Thus I've been a total slacker in regards to the blog....but I promise I'll get back into the swing of things.

Trying to prepare for the IEP meeting and "plan ahead" for next year has been extremely difficult....the "powers that be" have been discussing possible budget cuts for the school district, which if those take place then it will have a HUGE impact on what will happen for our son. The budget cuts will factor in to what services will be provided, aide assignment, and a multitude of other things. Thus unlike other IEP's in the past, this one will have a lot of the "well if 'X' happens, then we'll have to go with option 'Y'" type of scenarios. This IEP meeting will consist of a lot of "well we don't know" type of remarks from the team.....stupid budget cuts!

Also, as I try to prepare for the IEP meeting, my mind attempts to wrap around the fact that there is only one year left of Middle School, then our focus will be on High School and what will be needed in regards to course work for "Taz" to meet all of the requirements in order to graduate with the rest of his classmates. Yikes....as fast as this year flew by, I have a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach that the next 4 years will fly by just as quickly.....and then what? What will happen next? Will Taz be able to attend college? Will he find a job? Will I have any sanity left after dealing with him going through puberty?

When he was younger, I really felt like I had more answers.....like I knew what direction we were heading in & I was "Super Autism Mom", able to answer any question and/or take on any challenge that came our way.....which in some ways is funny to think about, because back then there wasn't even a slim fraction of the amount of info and so-called experts out there like there is now.  Holy cow, now there are a million different books, websites, blogs, facebook groups, experts, etc -- you name it, it's out there! But most of what I've found thus far has been geared at younger kids....not teens or soon-to-be adults. Where is the information that will help me & my teenage AI child?!?!

Now I feel lost at sea.....like I'm just bobbing along on some wave, with no clue what lies ahead.....for all I know, I could crash into some jagged rock at any moment. The "what next?" and "what if?" thoughts are a bit scary.....and to be totally honest, I sort of envy those parents who have AI kids that are just starting out in Elementary school. They have so much time to prepare their kids for the "future".....so much more time to plan and try to make sure their kids are ready for the big cruel world. And I'm sure by the time their kids reach this age, there will be a ton of services and things available to help them and their parents. When Taz was younger, I felt like I really had my stuff together -- I knew it all, and what I didn't know I was able to quickly find answers for......but as we enter the unknown of puberty & High School.....I just feel lost and overwhelmed.

Ok, so while I stress myself out over the "what's next?" stuff.....what would you all like to hear about? I know I promised to go on a rant (blog) about family......and talk about other things we've done over the years that have helped Taz reach the level he's at now.....I'll blog about that stuff soon, I promise. But in the mean time....send me your questions, let me know what you'd like to hear about. On a side note to the freaky people who are in a foreign country still checking out this blog.....it's about AUTISM, not anything else.....so if your not interested in reading about Autism, please go find some other blog to stalk.