Well we went and took a tour of the "crappy school" once again this past week, and I must say....it was a LOT different from the last time. Apparently some of the "powers that be" took our remarks to heart (regarding what we felt was wrong with the program when we took the tour last year), because they made some MAJOR changes to the program. I know part of the changes are due in part to the ISD taking over, however I was completely blown away by how different it was.
And to be 100% honest, the improvements to the program made it extremely difficult to find something negative about it. When we entered the building, I pretty much had my mind made up based on what we had seen last year....thus I was in a "I hate it" mode before walking in the door. But all of that quickly changed.....the classroom had been moved, the high heeled helper was no longer there, and everything was better.
The classroom space was much larger.....although it was in the same building as before, it had been moved to the other side of the building. Thus the room size was about twice as large as it had been last year....less cluttered and more inviting. The adjoining "relax/low stim room" had more space as well with lots of cool things like an exercise bike, a mini trampoline, and a swing. It was visually more inviting. By moving the location of the classrooms, there is now a locker area for the AI students at the end of the hall, a kitchen area on the corner where the life skills part of the class will take place, and a private drive right outside where the AI buses will line up for drop off/pick up.....thus the AI students aren't on the other side of the parking lot (where there is total chaos) with the regular general education buses. The other nice thing about the new location for the school buses, there will always be at least 2 adults outside to supervise the kids getting on and off the bus.....and at the transition location, there buses will also be in a different location with adult supervisors (thus a safer area for the AI kids).
They still have the mega sized swimming pool and swim time for the students, however with the changes that have taken place.....the doors to the pool area and locker rooms are kept locked when the pool is not being used, and the students are now supervised better during swim time.....thus less chance of an AI student wandering into the pool area alone and risking having something happen. But wait, that's not all.....now they also have life jackets available for the students to wear who aren't good swimmers (last year those weren't available).....and the students are required to wear the life jackets at all times when in the pool area until they have passed the swim test.
The "powers that be" took our remarks last year to heart, and made a LOT of changes to the program.....and we were told that IF we decide to have Taz enrolled in this program, he would have a one-on-one aide (unlike what we were told last year).....the teacher has reviewed his file in regards to where he is at academically, thus he would be going out for some general education classes and they have provisions in place just in case he has an "off" day and wouldn't be able to remain in the general education class (like math class for example) for the full hour. Thus he would definitely be working on grade level work and there is less of a chance that he would be behind academically (like how things were last year). The other positive thing, they are in the process of getting things worked out so IF Taz were to switch over to this program, his current aide "Miss A" would be able to go with him.....to help make the transition a bit easier....that is something that really made me happy to hear.
After the tour and having some time to speak to the teacher & new classroom assistant, and the ISD reps and other folks who had joined us on the tour.....we headed home to discuss our options and what would be the best choice for Taz at this point. The other change, unlike last year's tour....this year Taz's aide was able to go with us, thus as we walked around I asked her opinion of things and the various changes.....because aside from hubby and I, "Miss A" knows Taz so well that I know she would be able to help with pointing out where some trouble spots might be, things with the program that would & wouldn't work, etc. -- and like myself, "Miss A" had difficulty finding anything wrong with this new program and the many changes. Before we left the crappy school which now wasn't so crappy, I asked "Miss A" what her thoughts were.....it was like she had read my mind when she said "I really like it, and I think Taz will do well, perhaps we should give it a try?"
Once hubby & I returned home, we sat and discussed things in great detail. Just like last year, we made a list with both "positive" and "negative" columns, but unlike last year.....there were very few negatives that we could come up with. In all honesty, the only "negative" was the fact that this school is in the crappy part of town and at least a 30 minute drive from our house. Aside from that, we really loved all of the changes to the program and we both agreed that perhaps the best choice at this point in time was to agree to allow Taz to do the "30 day trial". Which according to the "powers that be" and the ISD rep, the 30 day trial would be something where we unofficially enroll Taz and let him test out this program.....then we would have a meeting before the end of the 30 day trial to determine where to go from there. If Taz is doing well, we would do all of the paperwork required to make him an officially enrolled student in the program, and he would continue with this program until the end of 8th grade. If for whatever reason things seem to not work out during the 30 day trial, we would determine what course of action to take from there instead (like for example, switch him back to a home base program). During this trial period, his aide would be at the new school working with him and assisting in teaching all of the new folks (teacher, classroom assistant, etc) what things work for Taz and what doesn't.
Thus after a lengthy discussion, we were in agreement....Taz would give this program a try and do the 30 day trial thing. I contacted our ISD rep, Mr. Pretty Frat Boy and gave him the news.....since it would be his job to get the ball rolling and do all of the needed paperwork, contact the transportation department for the ISD to arrange for bus transportation, set up a time and date for an IEP meeting, etc. The other positive about this year's tour....I had the opportunity to speak to the classroom teacher one-on-one....she assured me that her goal is not to send Taz home each day whenever there is a minor issue (like his current school did), her goal is to work through whatever the issue is and teach him coping skills. The ONLY time she sends a student home during the school day is if they are physically ill (vomiting, running a fever, etc) or if they are beyond the point of calming and trying to physically hurt themselves or someone else. As she said "I will call you if there is a problem, however my goal is to help him work through it not send him home whenever there is an issue. I have seen it all, dealt with it all....and unlike his current school, I know how to deal with students like him. My goal is to keep him at school for the entire day, not send him home just so I don't have to deal with whatever the issue is."
Hmmm, I have a feeling that this new teacher and I will get along just fine. She and I are so very similar in our thoughts, methods of dealing with issues, etc -- and we both have very strong opinions & aren't afraid to take on the "powers that be" to get what we want. Unlike the majority of the "team" at Taz's current school, this new teacher and her staff WANT to work with me -- they WANT to do what it takes to help Taz achieve his academic goals and be successful. This new teacher and staff WANT to see Taz succeed as much as we do.....and they are willing to do whatever it takes to achieve those goals. So...that's where we are at right now.....stepping out on a new adventure, testing the waters so to speak to determine if this new program will work for Taz and help to get him back on track. Once again I'm feeling optimistic and hopeful.....so we'll see where things go from here. The next few weeks are going to be extremely busy with meetings, getting paperwork done, etc so I'll try to keep you all updated as much as possible. Keep your fingers crossed that all goes well & this will be a positive new journey for us all.
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Here We Go Again
Well, if you've been following the blog then you're aware of what has happened thus far during 8th grade. Since my last post we've had numerous meetings, so many in fact that I've lost count. I am just tired of playing this "game" with the school....same thing year after year since Taz entered Middle School. I'm so tired of the so-called "experts" looking to me for ideas, suggestions, answers, etc. -- at times I just want to scream "If I had all of the answers, I'd be the freakin' expert instead of you, and trust me I'd do a much better job than what you have thus far!" Oh they make me so frustrated....I just want to scream! I am so tired of their claims that they are following the IEP and Behavior Plan, when I have a stack of paperwork proving that in fact, NO they have NOT been following either of them. They all claim that they want Taz there, yet their actions send a completely different message.
At this point due to the suspension and numerous meetings, Taz is temporarily on a "home base" work program. Which basically means, he's doing his school work from home....the difference between a "home base" program and homeschooling is that with "home base", the school is responsible for providing the correct academic work. The teachers are responsible for putting the assignments in a folder located in the school office, then son #2 picks up the work in said folder each day and brings it home so Taz can complete it. Once the work has been completed, we put it in a "completed" folder and son #2 takes it back to school for the teachers to pick up. Thus far, we've done our part by making sure that son #2 checks the folder each day and returns work promptly, and we've done our part by making sure that Taz is completing all work in a timely fashion. However, once again the school is "dropping the ball".....we aren't receiving assignments in a timely fashion (I've had to ask over and over, and basically beg the school to provide work for Taz to do). Also, the other problem is that the completed work is not being picked up from the folder by the teachers.
A perfect example of that: we turned in a stack of completed work on the 11th....today is the 16th....this morning I forgot to send the completed math homework with son #2, so before hubby had to leave for work, I drove to the school to drop it off. While there, I decided to check the "new work" folder.....there was ONE single-page science worksheet in it, that's it -- nothing else. During this time, I noticed that the "completed work" folder was rather thick....it sits on a shelf directly above the "new work" folder. So out of curiosity, I opened the completed work folder and discovered that the work we had turned in on the 11th was still in it (it had not been picked up) along with a few other worksheets that had been turned in a few days prior to the 11th. At that moment, I had a WTF episode! Why hasn't this completed work that was turned in almost a week ago been picked up by the teachers? They were all notified by "the powers that be" that this was how we'd be doing things while Taz was on home base....the teachers all go into the office at some point during the day to check their mailboxes, and the work folder area is right next to the mailbox room, thus it wouldn't be that difficult for them to check the folders or drop off work.....especially since son #2 drops stuff off first thing each morning before going to his locker, and from what I've been told the teachers don't check their mailboxes until after lunch.
Needless to say, I was NOT a happy camper! Apparently the office staff detected the smoke rolling out of my ears or something, because one of them said "is everything ok?" to which I responded as politely as possible..."no, it's not ok"...then I began to explain the "problem" to them. One person had the nerve to try to make excuses for the teachers...but when I cut her off mid sentence, she switched the excuse to "well they have been doing MEAP testing this past week." Well whoopee freakin' doo! That doesn't excuse the fact that prior to the suspension there were assignments that Taz hadn't received, and according to the school website there were still random classroom assignments that were being done in between the MEAP testing, thus we should have received some type of work. And that doesn't excuse the fact that the teachers are in the office each day, thus SOMEONE should have picked up the completed assignments....especially when I've taken the time to send each of them a "heads up" email on the days that work has been turned in, thus they KNEW it was there. I'm pretty sure the office staff could tell from the "sorry I'm not buying what you're selling" look on my face that it was pointless to try to argue with me. Sigh....I placed a call to our ISD rep when I got home.
Have I talked about our ISD rep yet? I'm sorry, I don't remember...and quite frankly I'm too tired & frustrated to go back and re-read 40+ blog entries to try to figure it out. So....suffice to say, we really like our ISD rep. He is a pretty boy/frat boy looking kind of guy, a real charmer who can convince people to do things his way just by flashing his pretty boy smile and dimples. When he speaks, you can just sense the sugar drippin' from his lips....he's that much of a sweet talking charmer. He's so calm, even when he's upset about something....thus for some reason Taz seems to respond to him really well. Over the past year though, some of the "powers that be" at the Middle School have managed to resist Pretty Boy's charms and dig their feet in, thus making PB's job a bit more difficult. In some ways, I think they have also managed to beat a little bit of the spark out of him....he just doesn't seem to have the drive and determination like he did when he first joined the team, and he doesn't flash those dimples as much as he used to. Although he seems to give in a bit more, the one thing he does well is quote the law and "rules" that they have to follow as per the ISD and the state.
PB was the one who set up the manifest meeting we had a week or so ago. At said meeting it was determined by PB's boss that the incident that took place that resulted in the suspension, was in fact due to Taz's disability. PB's boss also determined that NO the school did not follow Taz's IEP and/or Behavior Plan, thus they were technically at fault for what had happened...case closed, end of discussion.....now they have to do what PB's boss said. By the way, I like PB's boss....she's one of those "I'm not taking crap from anyone" type of gals. Anyhow, I left a message for PB regarding the assignments....am still waiting for a call back. We had a meeting last week with PB, his boss, and some other "boss" woman (I forget what her title is) to discuss what to do from here....they gave the ok for Taz to be put on temporary home base and set up the "rules" and plan that the school will follow during this time. We discussed with them the fact that we have an appointment tomorrow at a place in town....to discuss what services, if any are out there as extra things that could help Taz....and also discuss the possibility of putting him on some type of medication.
Gasp...yes I know, we're giving consideration to the return of medication. Hopefully not the same crap that caused problems with his heart -- I won't go back to stuff like that. No instead, we're looking at possible anxiety medication....but we will have to wait and see what the "new place" and people there suggest. They might not want to go the route of medication, (I hope they say no meds)....they may suggest some other type of therapy or change in his Behavior Plan and/or how the school is dealing with him (different type of classes, etc.). One thing that PB, his boss and the other lady mentioned was wanting us to reconsider the option of sending Taz to the horrid "south side" school.....they really want us to go back for another tour and give that place a second chance as a possible option. I don't want to even think about that place or go visit it again....once was enough....it was a hell hole....but that is another topic for a different post. So for now, we're playing the "let's wait and see" game....hopefully the "new place" tomorrow will have some information and/or suggestions that will help. We'll see....
At this point due to the suspension and numerous meetings, Taz is temporarily on a "home base" work program. Which basically means, he's doing his school work from home....the difference between a "home base" program and homeschooling is that with "home base", the school is responsible for providing the correct academic work. The teachers are responsible for putting the assignments in a folder located in the school office, then son #2 picks up the work in said folder each day and brings it home so Taz can complete it. Once the work has been completed, we put it in a "completed" folder and son #2 takes it back to school for the teachers to pick up. Thus far, we've done our part by making sure that son #2 checks the folder each day and returns work promptly, and we've done our part by making sure that Taz is completing all work in a timely fashion. However, once again the school is "dropping the ball".....we aren't receiving assignments in a timely fashion (I've had to ask over and over, and basically beg the school to provide work for Taz to do). Also, the other problem is that the completed work is not being picked up from the folder by the teachers.
A perfect example of that: we turned in a stack of completed work on the 11th....today is the 16th....this morning I forgot to send the completed math homework with son #2, so before hubby had to leave for work, I drove to the school to drop it off. While there, I decided to check the "new work" folder.....there was ONE single-page science worksheet in it, that's it -- nothing else. During this time, I noticed that the "completed work" folder was rather thick....it sits on a shelf directly above the "new work" folder. So out of curiosity, I opened the completed work folder and discovered that the work we had turned in on the 11th was still in it (it had not been picked up) along with a few other worksheets that had been turned in a few days prior to the 11th. At that moment, I had a WTF episode! Why hasn't this completed work that was turned in almost a week ago been picked up by the teachers? They were all notified by "the powers that be" that this was how we'd be doing things while Taz was on home base....the teachers all go into the office at some point during the day to check their mailboxes, and the work folder area is right next to the mailbox room, thus it wouldn't be that difficult for them to check the folders or drop off work.....especially since son #2 drops stuff off first thing each morning before going to his locker, and from what I've been told the teachers don't check their mailboxes until after lunch.
Needless to say, I was NOT a happy camper! Apparently the office staff detected the smoke rolling out of my ears or something, because one of them said "is everything ok?" to which I responded as politely as possible..."no, it's not ok"...then I began to explain the "problem" to them. One person had the nerve to try to make excuses for the teachers...but when I cut her off mid sentence, she switched the excuse to "well they have been doing MEAP testing this past week." Well whoopee freakin' doo! That doesn't excuse the fact that prior to the suspension there were assignments that Taz hadn't received, and according to the school website there were still random classroom assignments that were being done in between the MEAP testing, thus we should have received some type of work. And that doesn't excuse the fact that the teachers are in the office each day, thus SOMEONE should have picked up the completed assignments....especially when I've taken the time to send each of them a "heads up" email on the days that work has been turned in, thus they KNEW it was there. I'm pretty sure the office staff could tell from the "sorry I'm not buying what you're selling" look on my face that it was pointless to try to argue with me. Sigh....I placed a call to our ISD rep when I got home.
Have I talked about our ISD rep yet? I'm sorry, I don't remember...and quite frankly I'm too tired & frustrated to go back and re-read 40+ blog entries to try to figure it out. So....suffice to say, we really like our ISD rep. He is a pretty boy/frat boy looking kind of guy, a real charmer who can convince people to do things his way just by flashing his pretty boy smile and dimples. When he speaks, you can just sense the sugar drippin' from his lips....he's that much of a sweet talking charmer. He's so calm, even when he's upset about something....thus for some reason Taz seems to respond to him really well. Over the past year though, some of the "powers that be" at the Middle School have managed to resist Pretty Boy's charms and dig their feet in, thus making PB's job a bit more difficult. In some ways, I think they have also managed to beat a little bit of the spark out of him....he just doesn't seem to have the drive and determination like he did when he first joined the team, and he doesn't flash those dimples as much as he used to. Although he seems to give in a bit more, the one thing he does well is quote the law and "rules" that they have to follow as per the ISD and the state.
PB was the one who set up the manifest meeting we had a week or so ago. At said meeting it was determined by PB's boss that the incident that took place that resulted in the suspension, was in fact due to Taz's disability. PB's boss also determined that NO the school did not follow Taz's IEP and/or Behavior Plan, thus they were technically at fault for what had happened...case closed, end of discussion.....now they have to do what PB's boss said. By the way, I like PB's boss....she's one of those "I'm not taking crap from anyone" type of gals. Anyhow, I left a message for PB regarding the assignments....am still waiting for a call back. We had a meeting last week with PB, his boss, and some other "boss" woman (I forget what her title is) to discuss what to do from here....they gave the ok for Taz to be put on temporary home base and set up the "rules" and plan that the school will follow during this time. We discussed with them the fact that we have an appointment tomorrow at a place in town....to discuss what services, if any are out there as extra things that could help Taz....and also discuss the possibility of putting him on some type of medication.
Gasp...yes I know, we're giving consideration to the return of medication. Hopefully not the same crap that caused problems with his heart -- I won't go back to stuff like that. No instead, we're looking at possible anxiety medication....but we will have to wait and see what the "new place" and people there suggest. They might not want to go the route of medication, (I hope they say no meds)....they may suggest some other type of therapy or change in his Behavior Plan and/or how the school is dealing with him (different type of classes, etc.). One thing that PB, his boss and the other lady mentioned was wanting us to reconsider the option of sending Taz to the horrid "south side" school.....they really want us to go back for another tour and give that place a second chance as a possible option. I don't want to even think about that place or go visit it again....once was enough....it was a hell hole....but that is another topic for a different post. So for now, we're playing the "let's wait and see" game....hopefully the "new place" tomorrow will have some information and/or suggestions that will help. We'll see....
Thursday, October 11, 2012
How do you know?
I thought I had covered this topic already, but after looking back through the old posts apparently I just skimmed over the details....thus, I'll take a moment to answer one of the many questions I've been asked over and over throughout the years. This topic has been a huge "debate" over the years and always seems to get brought up for discussion among the many autism groups I'm on....thus I will tackle it now.
"How do you KNOW that vaccines caused your son's Autism?"
I know this topic has been debated and discussed over and over.....I know there have been many conflicting studies & reports, however regardless of what the "experts" claim to have proven....I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that vaccines WERE the cause of Taz's Autism, and I have the "proof" to back that up.
As I've said before, Taz received the 2-year shots TWICE....a month apart. Prior to that, he was "normal" -- age level and above in all areas of development. Also, prior to that he had a full blood workup done....I forget why, but his first doctor had ordered a crap load of blood work and I have a copy of the lab results. After all of this happened (the development of Autism), the doctor we switched to (doctor "M") and I were discussing my suspicions, and he agreed with me and the theory that the vaccines could be the culprit or as he termed "the trigger" that started this whole snowball rollin'....thus he ordered a full blood work lab set or whatever you want to call it, to be done on Taz. I also have a copy of the results of that lab work.
One thing we discovered.....Taz's lead/mercury levels were very high in the second set of labs compared to what had been done the first time around. There was no logical reason as to why.....nothing to explain what may have caused this result. There were a few other things as well, but this was the one fact that really jumped out at doctor "M" and I.....and as we all know, big pharm used to put mercury in these immunizations....specifically a substance called "trimerithol" (or something like that, forgive my spelling)...yet that substance isn't used now, or at least not as high of a level of it. Aside from having a copy of all of Taz's medical records up to this point, I also have the batch #'s from every single immunization he's ever received.
Thus after lots of time spent studying Taz's records and what was right in front of us in black & white on his charts, doctor "M" and I came to the conclusion that yes the duplicate immunizations WERE the cause of this. Perhaps there were other factors that helped to influence it, but the duplicate immunizations were the reason, or the smoking gun as some term it....like the second gunman on the grassy knoll. As I said, I know about the studies, etc -- and perhaps this isn't the "smoking gun" or the case for other children with Autism, however in our situation it is. I've looked over the labs, his medical chart, everything that has happened from point "A" to point "Z"....and know in my heart beyond a shadow of a doubt that this was the cause, this was the factor, this was whatever you want to term it. I have a giant 3-drawer file cabinet that is FULL of stuff about Taz -- medical documents, everything from when he was first diagnosed, copies of school papers, IEP's, etc -- you name it, it's in the file somewhere.
And the frustrating part? I can't do a damn thing about it.....the damage has already been done. There is no way to go back and turn back the clock, reverse what happened. I've already discussed my feelings regarding the doctor who made this "oops" by giving Taz the duplicate immunizations, so I won't go into all of that again....suffice to say, even if I could take some type of legal action against that doctor, it wouldn't make a difference -- the damage has already been done. Big deal if he could have lost his license, big deal if I could have sued him for a buttload of money....none of that would help Taz.....none of that would change what happened. Thus when people start to debate what causes Autism, I'm always happy to share our story....while it may not be the case with every child, I definitely believe that vaccines and more specifically the stuff that they put into them, are one of the triggers for other kids....perhaps others are environmental, or genetic, or something like the crap they used to put in children's Tylenol (fever med) or in baby formula or plastic baby bottles....who knows, but the stuff in vaccines is definitely a trigger....and in our case, not only was it a trigger but it was the bullet that was fired from the smoking gun. And as a result, our son's life has been forever changed.....
Now with that said, others have asked: "so are you against vaccines?" and my response to that is a loud and clear "Hell NO!".....why you ask? Well I do agree that vaccines are important, however I feel that they should be broken up or split and not given so much at once....a little baby's body can not handle having that much "junk" put into it in such a short time, especially when things are still in the development stage. I think back to when I was a kid, we didn't get this many shots....our parents allowed us to build our immune systems more. There wasn't a "pill" for every little issue....we didn't run to the doctor's every time we had the slightest cough or sniffle. And, our food was more "natural" than what's on the market today.....there weren't a ton of chemicals, red dye # whatever, preservatives, etc. in our foods like there are today. My mother cooked with lard not EVOO....we ate red meat, we ate bacon, we ate a LOT of home grown garden vegetables that were grown from seeds that hadn't been "genetically modified". I know another subject on the debate has been all of the pesticides and stuff like DDT.....people can point the finger and debate this topic until they are blue in the face. The bottom line though -- we need to look at EVERYTHING, big pharm needs to stop trying to blame everything else and actually look at all of these drugs and vaccines honestly, and both sides need to work together to figure out what is the cause (or if there are several factors).
When we first began this journey, the statistics were something like 1 out of 1,000 or some huge number like that....now it is 1 out of 10 children, specifically 1 out of 4 boys. IMHO that is a HUGE change over the past 10 years....the number of kids developing this disorder is increasing. Is that due to better detection and testing, or due to the actual factors/smoking gun things? Who knows, I'm not a scientist....but something has to be done, and soon. The one thing I do know beyond a shadow of a doubt is, in our situation....the vaccines were the "trigger" and nothing will ever change that fact.
"How do you KNOW that vaccines caused your son's Autism?"
I know this topic has been debated and discussed over and over.....I know there have been many conflicting studies & reports, however regardless of what the "experts" claim to have proven....I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that vaccines WERE the cause of Taz's Autism, and I have the "proof" to back that up.
As I've said before, Taz received the 2-year shots TWICE....a month apart. Prior to that, he was "normal" -- age level and above in all areas of development. Also, prior to that he had a full blood workup done....I forget why, but his first doctor had ordered a crap load of blood work and I have a copy of the lab results. After all of this happened (the development of Autism), the doctor we switched to (doctor "M") and I were discussing my suspicions, and he agreed with me and the theory that the vaccines could be the culprit or as he termed "the trigger" that started this whole snowball rollin'....thus he ordered a full blood work lab set or whatever you want to call it, to be done on Taz. I also have a copy of the results of that lab work.
One thing we discovered.....Taz's lead/mercury levels were very high in the second set of labs compared to what had been done the first time around. There was no logical reason as to why.....nothing to explain what may have caused this result. There were a few other things as well, but this was the one fact that really jumped out at doctor "M" and I.....and as we all know, big pharm used to put mercury in these immunizations....specifically a substance called "trimerithol" (or something like that, forgive my spelling)...yet that substance isn't used now, or at least not as high of a level of it. Aside from having a copy of all of Taz's medical records up to this point, I also have the batch #'s from every single immunization he's ever received.
Thus after lots of time spent studying Taz's records and what was right in front of us in black & white on his charts, doctor "M" and I came to the conclusion that yes the duplicate immunizations WERE the cause of this. Perhaps there were other factors that helped to influence it, but the duplicate immunizations were the reason, or the smoking gun as some term it....like the second gunman on the grassy knoll. As I said, I know about the studies, etc -- and perhaps this isn't the "smoking gun" or the case for other children with Autism, however in our situation it is. I've looked over the labs, his medical chart, everything that has happened from point "A" to point "Z"....and know in my heart beyond a shadow of a doubt that this was the cause, this was the factor, this was whatever you want to term it. I have a giant 3-drawer file cabinet that is FULL of stuff about Taz -- medical documents, everything from when he was first diagnosed, copies of school papers, IEP's, etc -- you name it, it's in the file somewhere.
And the frustrating part? I can't do a damn thing about it.....the damage has already been done. There is no way to go back and turn back the clock, reverse what happened. I've already discussed my feelings regarding the doctor who made this "oops" by giving Taz the duplicate immunizations, so I won't go into all of that again....suffice to say, even if I could take some type of legal action against that doctor, it wouldn't make a difference -- the damage has already been done. Big deal if he could have lost his license, big deal if I could have sued him for a buttload of money....none of that would help Taz.....none of that would change what happened. Thus when people start to debate what causes Autism, I'm always happy to share our story....while it may not be the case with every child, I definitely believe that vaccines and more specifically the stuff that they put into them, are one of the triggers for other kids....perhaps others are environmental, or genetic, or something like the crap they used to put in children's Tylenol (fever med) or in baby formula or plastic baby bottles....who knows, but the stuff in vaccines is definitely a trigger....and in our case, not only was it a trigger but it was the bullet that was fired from the smoking gun. And as a result, our son's life has been forever changed.....
Now with that said, others have asked: "so are you against vaccines?" and my response to that is a loud and clear "Hell NO!".....why you ask? Well I do agree that vaccines are important, however I feel that they should be broken up or split and not given so much at once....a little baby's body can not handle having that much "junk" put into it in such a short time, especially when things are still in the development stage. I think back to when I was a kid, we didn't get this many shots....our parents allowed us to build our immune systems more. There wasn't a "pill" for every little issue....we didn't run to the doctor's every time we had the slightest cough or sniffle. And, our food was more "natural" than what's on the market today.....there weren't a ton of chemicals, red dye # whatever, preservatives, etc. in our foods like there are today. My mother cooked with lard not EVOO....we ate red meat, we ate bacon, we ate a LOT of home grown garden vegetables that were grown from seeds that hadn't been "genetically modified". I know another subject on the debate has been all of the pesticides and stuff like DDT.....people can point the finger and debate this topic until they are blue in the face. The bottom line though -- we need to look at EVERYTHING, big pharm needs to stop trying to blame everything else and actually look at all of these drugs and vaccines honestly, and both sides need to work together to figure out what is the cause (or if there are several factors).
When we first began this journey, the statistics were something like 1 out of 1,000 or some huge number like that....now it is 1 out of 10 children, specifically 1 out of 4 boys. IMHO that is a HUGE change over the past 10 years....the number of kids developing this disorder is increasing. Is that due to better detection and testing, or due to the actual factors/smoking gun things? Who knows, I'm not a scientist....but something has to be done, and soon. The one thing I do know beyond a shadow of a doubt is, in our situation....the vaccines were the "trigger" and nothing will ever change that fact.
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Broken
Just as the title says, yesterday I felt completely "broken".....and today I am attempting to pick up the pieces and determine where to go from here. If you've been keeping up with the blog, then you should know why....if not, then here's a brief summary:
Although this year thus far has had some ups & downs, I honestly felt as though we were on the right track. We were doing everything possible to help Taz to re-focus and have a good year in 8th grade. We let down our guard just a little bit and put more trust in "the powers that be" more than we should have. We caved in to the strong arm tactics of the school -- agreed to switch his core classes from a general education setting to a "resource room" setting for this year -- in an effort to reduce his anxiety and issues. It was a good idea in theory, since it meant smaller class sizes, being with other kids who had the same issues (thus more acceptance from his peers), and allowing him to work at his own pace while still staying on track academically. Yes, although we had mixed feelings about this "change" -- it was a good idea in theory, and we felt it would start him out on the right foot. We believed that it would be what was best for Taz. Now we realize that we should have listened more to that "little voice" inside ourselves and gone with our gut feelings -- lesson learned -- the mistake won't happen again.
Alas, as we all know -- life with Autism is never a smooth ride. It's like a roller coaster -- full of twists and turns, highs and lows.....and just when you think it's starting to slow down -- wham -- things speed up and you have to hang on for dear life as it takes you around another turn. It's a never ending roller coaster ride -- and if you think otherwise then you're either in denial or fooling yourself. There is no time to catch your breath, no time to allow the knots in your stomach to relax a bit. The stress and bullshit (excuse my language) are never ending -- there is no "down time" -- and if you are foolish enough to let down your guard and attempt to relax just a bit, something else hits....at it hits hard! Sometimes it hits so hard that it knocks you completely on your ass, and you're left sitting there thinking "what the hell just happened?" -- it's like a 90 mph fast ball coming from somewhere in left field. Well, yesterday was one of those days......and by the time it was over, I felt completely broken.
As I said, Taz has had some difficult moments thus far this year -- but nothing that I couldn't handle -- or so I thought. I've done everything and more as a parent -- I've communicated via email, phone calls, and in person with various staff members and people on "the team" numerous times since the first day of school. I've made MANY suggestions, helped put together a behavior plan, provided Taz with "good choice" incentives, etc etc -- I've done my part and more. Yet for some reason the issues and bullshit continue -- and for the life of me, I don't understand why? Today I sit here wondering, is the "team" doing their part? Are they following the behavior plan? Well the answer to that one is....NO, no they are not. And yet somehow that is my fault? They screw up, they don't do what we've agreed upon -- Taz has an issue -- they fail to follow protocol -- the issue results in severe behavior -- and somehow I'm the one to blame?! Seriously.....the only response I have to that involves MANY swear words.
Ok so here's the thing....thus far up until yesterday, the behavior issues have all been what I would consider minor. Yes he made some bad choices, yes he said a few things that I'd consider to be typical "mouthy teenager" remarks -- but there was never any damage of property nor physical injury to anyone. However yesterday is a completely different story. He was a bit high strung when he got off the bus -- not sure why, since he was in a great mood when the bus arrived to pick him up in the morning. Rather than giving him a few minutes to "wind down", the "team" made the choice to take him into his first hour class knowing full well that he was on edge. The bad choices and behavior issues continued -- he was jumping off of chairs, yelling, etc. The "team" removed him from the room, gave him a few minutes of down time then proceeded to take him into his 2nd hour class even though he was still on edge & not at 100%. The issues and behavior continued, once again he was finally removed from the room (5 minutes before the bell rang) & given a few minutes, then they proceeded to take him into 3rd hour. From what the "team" told me -- in my oh so humble opinion, he was not calm enough at that point, and should never have been taken into his 3rd hour class. They failed to follow protocol and give me a "heads up" phone call as to what was going on, thus together we could have determined IF he should have been picked up during 1st hour or allowed to proceed to his next class. They failed to notify me during 2nd hour -- they made the choice and put him into a situation that once again in my oh so humble opinion, he shouldn't have been in. They put this in motion, not me -- because THEY failed to contact me and follow the behavior plan. They pushed him to go to each class, knowing that he was on edge and not at the behavior level he should have been.....their actions and decissions were like throwing gasoline on an already buring out of control fire.
As a result, Taz's behavior and poor choices were past the point of being escalated by 3rd hour -- and his "fight or flight" kicked in -- unfortunately what he did after that is the reason why he received a 5-day suspension. Unfortunately I can't go into too much detail at the moment, but suffice to say he threw something at a staff member. Now let me state for the record the staff member was NOT injured -- and it was a tiny object that really couldn't do that much harm. However, since Taz threw said object at someone rather than throwing it on the floor, etc the school's policy states that act of behavior is considered to be "assault", thus the 5-day suspension. Seriously? So if I go into the school and throw a marshmallow at someone, that would be considered assault because the marshmallow would be considered to be a "weapon" in their eyes? Give me a freaking break....(and no for the record, it wasn't a marshmallow that was thrown, just using that as an example since it's in the policy handbook). Yes I understand the seriousness of his action, and I understand the whole assault/weapon thing -- however he shouldn't have been put into that situation to begin with -- their mistake and bad choices, not mine.
Sigh, anyhow at that point "the powers that be" decided to call mom. Yeah, they completely ignore the behavior plan and do things that cause Taz's behavior to escalate to a level that it should NEVER have been at, THEN they call me -- great job team! (yes in case you didn't notice, that is said with sarcasm) You screw up and are partly to blame for what happened, then once it reaches a level that it should NEVER have reached -- you call in the calvary to clean up your mess. And once I get there -- which I will add, was at record time -- THEY put the blame for all of this on ME! Seriously, how is it my fault that you acted like assholes? How is it my fault that your decisions caused things to escalate to this point -- and caused Taz to reach the level that he was at? I know my kid, and he would NEVER have done what he did IF you as the adults would have made better choices. Therefore, YOU failed -- NOT me!
Yet somehow, the blame was put onto me. I was the one attempting to calm my son while the principal went all "drama club" on me -- talking about the what if stuff and saying how much worse things could have been. Duh asshole, I know that -- don't try to tell me about "what if" scenarios -- I'm the one who tried to explain all of that to you guys since day #1 -- but did any of you listen? No -- obviously not or we wouldn't be here doing this right now. Just stand there and don't bother to attempt to help out -- continue to lecture me, act all dramatic, and tell me how I'm such a bad parent. I'll handle my kid who outweighs me by about 20 pounds and is at least 3 inches taller than me -- you just stand there with a freakin' smirk on your face and continue to lecture me jackass --- that's really helping a lot -- NOT! And finally once I get my kid calm, and I'm attempting to listen to the aide explain what happened that led up to all of this -- Mr. Principal decides to start acting like a major dickhead. Gee, does it make you feel like a big man to sit there and threaten me -- do you feel a sense of power using your bullying strong-arm BS to bring me to tears? You sir are a major asshole! Yes my son made some bad choices and had bad behavior, but YOU and your "team" are also responsible for this because YOU failed to follow the behavior plan thus this is the result of YOUR mistakes -- not mine!
Anyhow, after sitting there listening to his drama lecture, threats, and major BS -- I walked out of the office in tears. The aide helped to get Taz out to the car, the principal just walked behind us with a big smirk on his face. I drove home in tears, escorted Taz into the house and explained to my husband what had happened -- threw the suspension notice at him and said "I can't deal with this shit any more, I need 5 minutes", then walked into my room -- threw myself on the bed and just sobbed uncontrollably for what seemed like an eternity. I felt completely broken -- the joy I had felt earlier in the week because of the plan to do the whole "Autism Education" presentation at the school was gone. I felt broken -- like my spirit had been crushed -- my heart was in a million different pieces -- and I had failed as a mother. How can I educate others on Autism and how to deal with it, when I'm such a failure? How can I make a difference in someone else's life when I can't even make one in my own son's? I had done everything that I could -- he is my life 24/7 -- and yet somehow it just isn't enough -- and somehow I've failed him. Yes I felt broken....I felt completely worthless and like a total failure.
God bless my husband -- he allowed me to have the time I needed to fall apart -- then he picked up the pieces and tried to put me back together. I felt weak, and he gave me strength. He has always been my lighthouse in this never ending storm that we call Autism. We've been on this journey together since day one, and at times I try to take more onto my shoulders than I should -- but when that happens, he always steps in and reminds me that this is not my battle to fight alone -- we fight the battles together. He looked at me and said "they are going to deal with me now -- you focus on Taz, I'll deal with the school" -- and I felt a sense of calm wash over me, because I could tell that he was pissed off and he would take things from here -- removing the burden from my shoulders. Yes they had awoken the pappa bear and now they will see that dealing with him is a LOT harder than dealing with me. Now for those who are asking "why didn't he go to pick Taz up?" -- he was out running errands at the time the school called. I called him when we were leaving the school, thus he was home once we got there.
I had been told that Mrs. W would call regarding how we would obtain Taz's homework, etc but the phone call never came yesterday. Instead I received an email late last night saying that basically she had never been told that she was the one who was suppose to deal with me & the homework issue. Great communication there team (yes said with sarcasm)! Our ISD rep never called either.....apparently none of the "team" told him what had happened. The only phone call that did come was from the vice principal. He had heard through the grapevine how upset I was when I left the office, and wanted to make sure that I was ok. He kept asking what his boss had said to me, because he knows that it takes a LOT to break me -- it takes a lot to reduce me to tears. As the phone call ended, he assured me that he'd make sure we had Taz's schoolwork and he'd be in touch today. Thus far today -- no phone calls -- no emails -- no contact of any kind. No one from the school, our ISD rep, Mrs. W, or other members of the "team" have made any type of contact....however I did learn through the grapevine that they have already re-assigned Taz's aide to a new building (they made that change before the end of the day yesterday). Apparently they aren't expecting Taz to return to school once the suspension is over -- they are assuming we will switch school districts and/or just decide to homeschool him. Hmmm....really?
As hubby said, they have made it clear over the past 2 years that they really don't want to deal with Taz -- they really don't want him at their school. They have done everything they can to push our buttons, to make things more difficult than they should be -- and we've always fought back -- we've always fought for our son. Their actions of moving his aide to a different building says it all -- they are hoping that we've given up. I have no doubt that yesterday they tried to break me -- the smirk on the Principal's face said it all -- and I'm sure they are hoping that this is the last they will see of Taz (next year he'll be in high school -- different building, different staff) -- thus no longer their "problem" to deal with. There is no logical reason for them to move his aide -- their building is short staffed, thus she could fill in and help out while he's on suspension -- yet instead they move her out of the building completely? Apparently they fail to realize, we've done this dance before.....it may be a different song playing, but it's the same old dance.....and they should know by now, that they might have knocked me down but they will never knock us out. We will fight for what our son needs, we will fight for his rights, and we will never give up. No, they haven't seen the last of us.....not by a long shot.
Although this year thus far has had some ups & downs, I honestly felt as though we were on the right track. We were doing everything possible to help Taz to re-focus and have a good year in 8th grade. We let down our guard just a little bit and put more trust in "the powers that be" more than we should have. We caved in to the strong arm tactics of the school -- agreed to switch his core classes from a general education setting to a "resource room" setting for this year -- in an effort to reduce his anxiety and issues. It was a good idea in theory, since it meant smaller class sizes, being with other kids who had the same issues (thus more acceptance from his peers), and allowing him to work at his own pace while still staying on track academically. Yes, although we had mixed feelings about this "change" -- it was a good idea in theory, and we felt it would start him out on the right foot. We believed that it would be what was best for Taz. Now we realize that we should have listened more to that "little voice" inside ourselves and gone with our gut feelings -- lesson learned -- the mistake won't happen again.
Alas, as we all know -- life with Autism is never a smooth ride. It's like a roller coaster -- full of twists and turns, highs and lows.....and just when you think it's starting to slow down -- wham -- things speed up and you have to hang on for dear life as it takes you around another turn. It's a never ending roller coaster ride -- and if you think otherwise then you're either in denial or fooling yourself. There is no time to catch your breath, no time to allow the knots in your stomach to relax a bit. The stress and bullshit (excuse my language) are never ending -- there is no "down time" -- and if you are foolish enough to let down your guard and attempt to relax just a bit, something else hits....at it hits hard! Sometimes it hits so hard that it knocks you completely on your ass, and you're left sitting there thinking "what the hell just happened?" -- it's like a 90 mph fast ball coming from somewhere in left field. Well, yesterday was one of those days......and by the time it was over, I felt completely broken.
As I said, Taz has had some difficult moments thus far this year -- but nothing that I couldn't handle -- or so I thought. I've done everything and more as a parent -- I've communicated via email, phone calls, and in person with various staff members and people on "the team" numerous times since the first day of school. I've made MANY suggestions, helped put together a behavior plan, provided Taz with "good choice" incentives, etc etc -- I've done my part and more. Yet for some reason the issues and bullshit continue -- and for the life of me, I don't understand why? Today I sit here wondering, is the "team" doing their part? Are they following the behavior plan? Well the answer to that one is....NO, no they are not. And yet somehow that is my fault? They screw up, they don't do what we've agreed upon -- Taz has an issue -- they fail to follow protocol -- the issue results in severe behavior -- and somehow I'm the one to blame?! Seriously.....the only response I have to that involves MANY swear words.
Ok so here's the thing....thus far up until yesterday, the behavior issues have all been what I would consider minor. Yes he made some bad choices, yes he said a few things that I'd consider to be typical "mouthy teenager" remarks -- but there was never any damage of property nor physical injury to anyone. However yesterday is a completely different story. He was a bit high strung when he got off the bus -- not sure why, since he was in a great mood when the bus arrived to pick him up in the morning. Rather than giving him a few minutes to "wind down", the "team" made the choice to take him into his first hour class knowing full well that he was on edge. The bad choices and behavior issues continued -- he was jumping off of chairs, yelling, etc. The "team" removed him from the room, gave him a few minutes of down time then proceeded to take him into his 2nd hour class even though he was still on edge & not at 100%. The issues and behavior continued, once again he was finally removed from the room (5 minutes before the bell rang) & given a few minutes, then they proceeded to take him into 3rd hour. From what the "team" told me -- in my oh so humble opinion, he was not calm enough at that point, and should never have been taken into his 3rd hour class. They failed to follow protocol and give me a "heads up" phone call as to what was going on, thus together we could have determined IF he should have been picked up during 1st hour or allowed to proceed to his next class. They failed to notify me during 2nd hour -- they made the choice and put him into a situation that once again in my oh so humble opinion, he shouldn't have been in. They put this in motion, not me -- because THEY failed to contact me and follow the behavior plan. They pushed him to go to each class, knowing that he was on edge and not at the behavior level he should have been.....their actions and decissions were like throwing gasoline on an already buring out of control fire.
As a result, Taz's behavior and poor choices were past the point of being escalated by 3rd hour -- and his "fight or flight" kicked in -- unfortunately what he did after that is the reason why he received a 5-day suspension. Unfortunately I can't go into too much detail at the moment, but suffice to say he threw something at a staff member. Now let me state for the record the staff member was NOT injured -- and it was a tiny object that really couldn't do that much harm. However, since Taz threw said object at someone rather than throwing it on the floor, etc the school's policy states that act of behavior is considered to be "assault", thus the 5-day suspension. Seriously? So if I go into the school and throw a marshmallow at someone, that would be considered assault because the marshmallow would be considered to be a "weapon" in their eyes? Give me a freaking break....(and no for the record, it wasn't a marshmallow that was thrown, just using that as an example since it's in the policy handbook). Yes I understand the seriousness of his action, and I understand the whole assault/weapon thing -- however he shouldn't have been put into that situation to begin with -- their mistake and bad choices, not mine.
Sigh, anyhow at that point "the powers that be" decided to call mom. Yeah, they completely ignore the behavior plan and do things that cause Taz's behavior to escalate to a level that it should NEVER have been at, THEN they call me -- great job team! (yes in case you didn't notice, that is said with sarcasm) You screw up and are partly to blame for what happened, then once it reaches a level that it should NEVER have reached -- you call in the calvary to clean up your mess. And once I get there -- which I will add, was at record time -- THEY put the blame for all of this on ME! Seriously, how is it my fault that you acted like assholes? How is it my fault that your decisions caused things to escalate to this point -- and caused Taz to reach the level that he was at? I know my kid, and he would NEVER have done what he did IF you as the adults would have made better choices. Therefore, YOU failed -- NOT me!
Yet somehow, the blame was put onto me. I was the one attempting to calm my son while the principal went all "drama club" on me -- talking about the what if stuff and saying how much worse things could have been. Duh asshole, I know that -- don't try to tell me about "what if" scenarios -- I'm the one who tried to explain all of that to you guys since day #1 -- but did any of you listen? No -- obviously not or we wouldn't be here doing this right now. Just stand there and don't bother to attempt to help out -- continue to lecture me, act all dramatic, and tell me how I'm such a bad parent. I'll handle my kid who outweighs me by about 20 pounds and is at least 3 inches taller than me -- you just stand there with a freakin' smirk on your face and continue to lecture me jackass --- that's really helping a lot -- NOT! And finally once I get my kid calm, and I'm attempting to listen to the aide explain what happened that led up to all of this -- Mr. Principal decides to start acting like a major dickhead. Gee, does it make you feel like a big man to sit there and threaten me -- do you feel a sense of power using your bullying strong-arm BS to bring me to tears? You sir are a major asshole! Yes my son made some bad choices and had bad behavior, but YOU and your "team" are also responsible for this because YOU failed to follow the behavior plan thus this is the result of YOUR mistakes -- not mine!
Anyhow, after sitting there listening to his drama lecture, threats, and major BS -- I walked out of the office in tears. The aide helped to get Taz out to the car, the principal just walked behind us with a big smirk on his face. I drove home in tears, escorted Taz into the house and explained to my husband what had happened -- threw the suspension notice at him and said "I can't deal with this shit any more, I need 5 minutes", then walked into my room -- threw myself on the bed and just sobbed uncontrollably for what seemed like an eternity. I felt completely broken -- the joy I had felt earlier in the week because of the plan to do the whole "Autism Education" presentation at the school was gone. I felt broken -- like my spirit had been crushed -- my heart was in a million different pieces -- and I had failed as a mother. How can I educate others on Autism and how to deal with it, when I'm such a failure? How can I make a difference in someone else's life when I can't even make one in my own son's? I had done everything that I could -- he is my life 24/7 -- and yet somehow it just isn't enough -- and somehow I've failed him. Yes I felt broken....I felt completely worthless and like a total failure.
God bless my husband -- he allowed me to have the time I needed to fall apart -- then he picked up the pieces and tried to put me back together. I felt weak, and he gave me strength. He has always been my lighthouse in this never ending storm that we call Autism. We've been on this journey together since day one, and at times I try to take more onto my shoulders than I should -- but when that happens, he always steps in and reminds me that this is not my battle to fight alone -- we fight the battles together. He looked at me and said "they are going to deal with me now -- you focus on Taz, I'll deal with the school" -- and I felt a sense of calm wash over me, because I could tell that he was pissed off and he would take things from here -- removing the burden from my shoulders. Yes they had awoken the pappa bear and now they will see that dealing with him is a LOT harder than dealing with me. Now for those who are asking "why didn't he go to pick Taz up?" -- he was out running errands at the time the school called. I called him when we were leaving the school, thus he was home once we got there.
I had been told that Mrs. W would call regarding how we would obtain Taz's homework, etc but the phone call never came yesterday. Instead I received an email late last night saying that basically she had never been told that she was the one who was suppose to deal with me & the homework issue. Great communication there team (yes said with sarcasm)! Our ISD rep never called either.....apparently none of the "team" told him what had happened. The only phone call that did come was from the vice principal. He had heard through the grapevine how upset I was when I left the office, and wanted to make sure that I was ok. He kept asking what his boss had said to me, because he knows that it takes a LOT to break me -- it takes a lot to reduce me to tears. As the phone call ended, he assured me that he'd make sure we had Taz's schoolwork and he'd be in touch today. Thus far today -- no phone calls -- no emails -- no contact of any kind. No one from the school, our ISD rep, Mrs. W, or other members of the "team" have made any type of contact....however I did learn through the grapevine that they have already re-assigned Taz's aide to a new building (they made that change before the end of the day yesterday). Apparently they aren't expecting Taz to return to school once the suspension is over -- they are assuming we will switch school districts and/or just decide to homeschool him. Hmmm....really?
As hubby said, they have made it clear over the past 2 years that they really don't want to deal with Taz -- they really don't want him at their school. They have done everything they can to push our buttons, to make things more difficult than they should be -- and we've always fought back -- we've always fought for our son. Their actions of moving his aide to a different building says it all -- they are hoping that we've given up. I have no doubt that yesterday they tried to break me -- the smirk on the Principal's face said it all -- and I'm sure they are hoping that this is the last they will see of Taz (next year he'll be in high school -- different building, different staff) -- thus no longer their "problem" to deal with. There is no logical reason for them to move his aide -- their building is short staffed, thus she could fill in and help out while he's on suspension -- yet instead they move her out of the building completely? Apparently they fail to realize, we've done this dance before.....it may be a different song playing, but it's the same old dance.....and they should know by now, that they might have knocked me down but they will never knock us out. We will fight for what our son needs, we will fight for his rights, and we will never give up. No, they haven't seen the last of us.....not by a long shot.
Monday, October 1, 2012
Explaining Autism
Hello blog peeps, sorry I've been a bit MIA....as always, I've had too much to do and not enough hours in the day to do it all. I'm the type of person who feels that I have to take on the world -- have a million things to do at the same time -- and always have a hard time saying "no" to adding something else to my shoulders, especially when my plate is already full enough. Not sure if it's a "mom" thing or if it's just my personality type -- but at times I feel like the only way that I can actually be productive and accomplish things is if I really DO have too much on my plate. Now with that said.....here's some big news (well at least it's "big" to me):
Holy cow....I was just asked to give a presentation on Autism/Aspergers! I'll actually be 1 of 2 people doing this (it will be an education professional and myself), speaking to a group of middle school age kids. The EP will address things from an educational standpoint, with all of the "medical term" stuff, etc....my part is to discuss our experience and explain things from a personal view, basically a "see Autism through my eyes" type of thing. Then together we will provide various role play social story type scenarios. Similar to the "say no to drugs" type of stuff and other issues that all teens deal with.
The goal is to help educate "normal" teens on how to be more accepting, understanding, etc of their AI peers and to help teach them how to assist their AI peers in developing the proper social skills. You know, the whole "lead by example" concept. The EP wants me to speak from the heart and cover what I feel these kids should know -- of course I want to make sure I cover everything possible! Seriously, I've only got 1 shot at this -- so I don't want to screw up or forget something important. Especially since the teen years are the hardest -- and kids this age can be so cruel to other kids who are "different".
Now those of you who know me, and/or who have at least read all of my blog posts....you know that I've gone in and spoken to our son's class each year since he entered the public school system. The whole reason I did that was to help teach the "normal" kids about Autism, and help them to understand that it's ok if someone is a little different.....my goal was that if I could make them understand that, understand what Autism is and who Taz is, then they'd be more accepting of him. Thus I have gone in and spoken to the class year after year.....right up until the year Taz entered middle school. I begged the administration to allow me to do a presentation for the middle school kids, but had always been told "oh no that's not possible, we can't do something like that in middle school" -- my response was always "why not?" -- ok I understand that there are numerous classes each hour, but couldn't they just have a mini assembly or something? Would it really be that difficult to do?
Anyhow, I've done these presentations year after year....I've even given presentations to other Elementary age classrooms....classrooms that didn't even have one of my kids in it! Over the years other teachers have heard about the presentations and have approached me, asking if I'd come in and speak to their students -- I always did. I figured if I could help some other kids to be accepting and understanding of the AI students in their classroom, then in some way it would help and make a difference. Thus in the past I've given this presentation to kids from age 6 to 10 years old. But this is the first time speaking to teens! YIKES!! We all know that most teens these days act like complete a**holes....they think they know everything, they have major attitudes, and think it's funny to bully people who are "different" -- so exactly what will I say that will sink in? What can I say that will change their minds and make them look at AI students in a different way? How can I help them to stop acting like a**holes?
In some ways it annoys me, because I've asked for the past few years to do something like this (ever since Taz entered middle school) but have always been told "oh no that's not possible" -- yet now here I am, being asked to do it! (insert scream here) Instead of me begging the administration -- here they are, approaching me and asking me to do it.....the EP I spoke to today practically begged me to agree to do this. So what the hell happened to change things? Why all of a sudden have the "powers that be" had a change of heart? Could someone pinch me? Cause I feel like I'm dreaming right now. Is this really happening? Am I finally getting what I've been wishing for and begging them to allow me to do for so long?
I know I can do this, yet I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment....doubting how effective I'll be. I really don't want to screw this up -- I want the things I say and the material I present to have a REAL impact on the kids. I have a million things running through my mind right now....oh where to begin?! Oh yeah, I've also been asked to be a part of a parent group and give the presentation at one of the parent meetings. The goal with that is the person in charge wants me to help educate the general education parents as well as be a "mentor" for AI parents just beginning this journey. Apparently the "powers that be" have finally come to realize that kids act the way they do partly because of the parents -- thus if we can educate them and change their attitudes/views then we can do the same for the teens. And of course since I really want to help make a difference -- and hope that by doing this, it will make life at middle school easier for Taz -- I said yes. As if my plate wasn't full enough....hey life, feel free to pile on a little more! Let's hope that I don't burn myself out in the process.
Holy cow....I was just asked to give a presentation on Autism/Aspergers! I'll actually be 1 of 2 people doing this (it will be an education professional and myself), speaking to a group of middle school age kids. The EP will address things from an educational standpoint, with all of the "medical term" stuff, etc....my part is to discuss our experience and explain things from a personal view, basically a "see Autism through my eyes" type of thing. Then together we will provide various role play social story type scenarios. Similar to the "say no to drugs" type of stuff and other issues that all teens deal with.
The goal is to help educate "normal" teens on how to be more accepting, understanding, etc of their AI peers and to help teach them how to assist their AI peers in developing the proper social skills. You know, the whole "lead by example" concept. The EP wants me to speak from the heart and cover what I feel these kids should know -- of course I want to make sure I cover everything possible! Seriously, I've only got 1 shot at this -- so I don't want to screw up or forget something important. Especially since the teen years are the hardest -- and kids this age can be so cruel to other kids who are "different".
Now those of you who know me, and/or who have at least read all of my blog posts....you know that I've gone in and spoken to our son's class each year since he entered the public school system. The whole reason I did that was to help teach the "normal" kids about Autism, and help them to understand that it's ok if someone is a little different.....my goal was that if I could make them understand that, understand what Autism is and who Taz is, then they'd be more accepting of him. Thus I have gone in and spoken to the class year after year.....right up until the year Taz entered middle school. I begged the administration to allow me to do a presentation for the middle school kids, but had always been told "oh no that's not possible, we can't do something like that in middle school" -- my response was always "why not?" -- ok I understand that there are numerous classes each hour, but couldn't they just have a mini assembly or something? Would it really be that difficult to do?
Anyhow, I've done these presentations year after year....I've even given presentations to other Elementary age classrooms....classrooms that didn't even have one of my kids in it! Over the years other teachers have heard about the presentations and have approached me, asking if I'd come in and speak to their students -- I always did. I figured if I could help some other kids to be accepting and understanding of the AI students in their classroom, then in some way it would help and make a difference. Thus in the past I've given this presentation to kids from age 6 to 10 years old. But this is the first time speaking to teens! YIKES!! We all know that most teens these days act like complete a**holes....they think they know everything, they have major attitudes, and think it's funny to bully people who are "different" -- so exactly what will I say that will sink in? What can I say that will change their minds and make them look at AI students in a different way? How can I help them to stop acting like a**holes?
In some ways it annoys me, because I've asked for the past few years to do something like this (ever since Taz entered middle school) but have always been told "oh no that's not possible" -- yet now here I am, being asked to do it! (insert scream here) Instead of me begging the administration -- here they are, approaching me and asking me to do it.....the EP I spoke to today practically begged me to agree to do this. So what the hell happened to change things? Why all of a sudden have the "powers that be" had a change of heart? Could someone pinch me? Cause I feel like I'm dreaming right now. Is this really happening? Am I finally getting what I've been wishing for and begging them to allow me to do for so long?
I know I can do this, yet I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment....doubting how effective I'll be. I really don't want to screw this up -- I want the things I say and the material I present to have a REAL impact on the kids. I have a million things running through my mind right now....oh where to begin?! Oh yeah, I've also been asked to be a part of a parent group and give the presentation at one of the parent meetings. The goal with that is the person in charge wants me to help educate the general education parents as well as be a "mentor" for AI parents just beginning this journey. Apparently the "powers that be" have finally come to realize that kids act the way they do partly because of the parents -- thus if we can educate them and change their attitudes/views then we can do the same for the teens. And of course since I really want to help make a difference -- and hope that by doing this, it will make life at middle school easier for Taz -- I said yes. As if my plate wasn't full enough....hey life, feel free to pile on a little more! Let's hope that I don't burn myself out in the process.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)